scream-of-consciousness;
"If you're trying to change minds and influence people it's probably not a good idea to say that virtually all elected Democrats are liars, but what the hell."
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Tuesday, March 23, 2010
SLAP CHOPPED
You Get It All!
I've had a lifelong fascination with what are now called infomercials. The king of that genre is Ron Popiel, hands down. I found, via the wonderfully kitschy KA_CHING!, this early Popiel commercial for the Chop-O-Matic. I was struck by how much of Popiel's shtick was lifted by Sham-Wow Vinnie. Have a look, then check out The History
of As Seen On TV Infomercials
First, take what you want chopped and cut it into small pieces so they can fit in the chopper. Then use the chopper to make them into even smaller pieces. It is like making twice the mess at more of the expense!!
My favorite line from infomercials.... "The secret is..."
Ah, the good old days. You sent a check or money order, and once it cleared, they sent you the goods. By ground shipping. No FedEx, no internet, no credit cards, no overnight delivery, no order by five and get it the next day. All the old-timers say it with me: "Please allow four to six weeks for delivery."
"Please allow four to six weeks for delivery." If it arrived sooner you had to say, "I'm sorry, I can't accept that. It hasn't been four weeks yet."
My lifelong fascination with what are now called infomercials consists of, "Who the heck would want to watch such a thing?" To me, advertising has always been a mysteriously necessary evil. I have been driven away from television not because I particularly dislike the programs but because I am deeply insulted by most of the commercials. I don't care how long the ad for that "Slap-Chop' is, I'm just not stupid enough to want to buy such a useless thing. I usually don't make it through the thirty second commercials for it.
The first Popiel product I remember was the "Popiel Pocket Fisherman" and even as a young kid you had to wonder why anyone would ever buy such a thing.
Yet just a few day ago a much older Ron Popiel was on very late TV selling knives. He has a full beard now(same huge lips tho)but is ancient.
I dont remember who first advertised it, but I still love my veg-o-matic. Best french fry maker in the world. I bought Mom one in the late 60s and I got one at a yard sale in the early 80s. I keep buying replacement parts on ebay. Tim
I remember the guys shilling at the "greater new england fair" of some sort in West Springfield, MA. On the corner of the display booth rows barking away with a mirror mounted above the barker's head so's you could see the knifery or whatever over the heads of the crowd. They'd always have people 'buying' and carrying off 'bags of stuff'... Dunno if they were shills or not as I was but a mere 8th grader, and wouldn't know a shill from a pill. tomw
First, take what you want chopped and cut it into small pieces so they can fit in the chopper. Then use the chopper to make them into even smaller pieces. It is like making twice the mess at more of the expense!!
ReplyDeleteMy favorite line from infomercials.... "The secret is..."
How did they order without credit cards?
ReplyDeleteMM
I have a newer version and it kicks-chops up my garlic really fast and no sticky fingers
I buy my garlic already chopped at Costco.
ReplyDeleteCasca
Me too, and I use a ton of it!
ReplyDelete"How did they order without credit cards?"
ReplyDeleteAh, the good old days. You sent a check or money order, and once it cleared, they sent you the goods. By ground shipping. No FedEx, no internet, no credit cards, no overnight delivery, no order by five and get it the next day. All the old-timers say it with me: "Please allow four to six weeks for delivery."
Back then, you often could order c.o.d. (cash on delivery), and the postman would collect the money.
ReplyDeleteWow, I'd forgotten about C.O.D. That was back when mailmen delivered when it was raining, or snowing. Wow.
ReplyDeleteOne thing unchanged from then to now is the magical, breathless phrase "But wait, there's more!"
ReplyDeleteLt. Col. Gen. Tailgunner dick
"Please allow four to six weeks for delivery." If it arrived sooner you had to say, "I'm sorry, I can't accept that. It hasn't been four weeks yet."
ReplyDeleteMy lifelong fascination with what are now called infomercials consists of, "Who the heck would want to watch such a thing?" To me, advertising has always been a mysteriously necessary evil. I have been driven away from television not because I particularly dislike the programs but because I am deeply insulted by most of the commercials. I don't care how long the ad for that "Slap-Chop' is, I'm just not stupid enough to want to buy such a useless thing. I usually don't make it through the thirty second commercials for it.
The first Popiel product I remember was the "Popiel Pocket Fisherman" and even as a young kid you had to wonder why anyone would ever buy such a thing.
ReplyDeleteYet just a few day ago a much older Ron Popiel was on very late TV selling knives. He has a full beard now(same huge lips tho)but is ancient.
I like this version better
ReplyDeleteI used my "Pocket Fisherman" to fly a kite. Made retracting the string a cinch.
ReplyDeleteI have my original pocket fisherman, and still use it from time to time.
ReplyDeleteI dont remember who first advertised it, but I still love my veg-o-matic. Best french fry maker in the world. I bought Mom one in the late 60s and I got one at a yard sale in the early 80s. I keep buying replacement parts on ebay.
ReplyDeleteTim
I remember the guys shilling at the "greater new england fair" of some sort in West Springfield, MA. On the corner of the display booth rows barking away with a mirror mounted above the barker's head so's you could see the knifery or whatever over the heads of the crowd.
ReplyDeleteThey'd always have people 'buying' and carrying off 'bags of stuff'...
Dunno if they were shills or not as I was but a mere 8th grader, and wouldn't know a shill from a pill.
tomw
"Just put your hand in Kitchen Magician and watch those fingers fly!"
ReplyDeleteGrinfilledCelt