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RUNNERS UP On a diet, then, madam? Very well, allow me to remove the toppings for you. - Doug M I'll be right back with your diet coke. - K9 And would madam care for more appetizer? Doug M The pot luck special
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scream-of-consciousness; "If you're trying to change minds and influence people it's probably not a good idea to say that virtually all elected Democrats are liars, but what the hell."
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And for dessert we do have the traditional wafer thin mint...
ReplyDeleteBefore he starred in James Cameron's version, Leo DiCaprio had an unheralded role in a previous version of the movie where he played a steam room worker who stumbled into the kitchen and became a waiter...
ReplyDelete"The medium is the message."
ReplyDelete-Marshall McLuhan
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I'll be right back with your diet coke.
ReplyDeleteNo TMI, the Jumbo is the message.
ReplyDeleteCasca
• The theme for this month's Monty Python Re-enactment Society meeting is "The Meaning of Life."
ReplyDelete• Shall I super-size that madam?
• Would you hold the doggie bag open for me, please, madam?
• The lady at the next table said, "I'll have what she's having," so I'm taking yours over to her.
• Halal? Oh, I'm sure it must be, madam.
• Well, there's not much Spam in it.
• Your fettuccine guano, madam.
• And would madam care for more appetizer?
• Yes, madam. Guaranteed organic, gluten-free, high-fiber, vegetarian silage.
• I highly recommend it, madam. It's what our chef's dinner eats.
• We have it flown in fresh daily from the kelp forests of California.
• On a diet, then, madam? Very well, allow me to remove the toppings for you.
• See? Your little Peke was in there all the time.
OTOH, we have had the case of a famous cook expelling a supermodel (aka bag-of-bones) from his restaurant, saying he didn't want any paparazzi photos of her leaving his establishment, "it would be bad advertising" :-)
ReplyDeleteAnd yet you never hear of restaurant owners turning people away for being too fat! :-(
fettuccine guano
ReplyDeleteDougM is in a dead heat with RKOF!
I hadn't caught my breath from RKOF's caption and pic when I read that. HFS, I'm choking and gasping here guys, ease up will ya.
Lt. Col. Gen. Tailgunner dick
"Perfect! Now, where did I put my packet of 'Sensa'?"
ReplyDeleteYes I have lost some weight. It's so sweet of you to notice.
ReplyDeletePerhaps madam will be able to keep it down THIS TIME. And madam need not worry, there's lots more room in the vomit bucket now.
ReplyDeleteCF in CO
And sir, please make sure those strands of MY spaghetti on YOUR jacket make it onto MY plate.
ReplyDeleteCF in CO
"He put up one heck of a fight, but here is your Flying Spaghetti Monster Alfredo..."
ReplyDelete• Compliments of the Kanamit gentleman at the end of the bar, madam.
ReplyDelete• Pardon, madam, but you have a little something on your chin. No, your other chin.
• No, madam, these portions are not meant as an insult. Your other waiters will be along shortly.
• I'm sorry, madam, but that is the strongest fork we have.
Swingin' after the bell, here, boss:
ReplyDelete• It's a variation of the ploughman's lunch we call the stable-boy.
• I'm sorry, madam. We're out of the Caesar salad. Perhaps madam would enjoy our Hurcules Augean salad, instead.
(okay, I'm done)