You may be a Muslum ...

You may be a Muslim   1. You grow poppies and refine heroin for a living, but you have a moral objection to liquor. You may be a Muslim 2. You own a $3,000 machine gun and $5,000 rocket launcher and ammo, but you can't afford shoes. You may be a Muslim 3. You have more wives than teeth. You may be a Muslim 4. You wipe your butt with your bare hand, but consider bacon and pork unclean. You may be a Muslim 5. You think vests come in two styles: bullet-proof and suicide. You may be a Muslim 6. You can't think of anyone you haven't declared Jihad against. You may be a Muslim 7. You consider television dangerous, but routinely carry explosives in your clothing. You may be a Muslim 8. You were amazed to discover that cell phones have uses other than setting off roadside bombs. You may be a Muslim 9. You have nothing against women and think every man should own at least four. You may be a Muslim 10. Your cousin is president of the United States .You may be a Muslim attributed to Hillary Clinton (Democrat Sec/State Alumni Dinner - 7-8-2012)