scream-of-consciousness;
"If you're trying to change minds and influence people it's probably not a good idea to say that virtually all elected Democrats are liars, but what the hell."
^ Lady leans over and whispers, "I'll do anything for $100." Feller says, "Okay," drives her back to his place and says, "Paint my house." (third-oldest joke I can remember)
That's why we have marriage. You can pay a woman to cook for you. You can pay a woman to clean for you. You can pay a woman to raise your children. You can pay a woman to do just about anything. Put if you pay her for nookie, they will put you in jai! Tim
• Hey, 'em sammiches ain't gonna make themselves.
ReplyDelete• Her ketchup fortune helps.
• There's the citizenship.
it's best if she doesn't speak english. then i don't have to listen to her.
ReplyDeleteWhoa, dude - check out her TOASTER!
ReplyDelete--Jimmy don\'t play that
That reminds me of the joke where a man walks into a bar and finds on the wall:
ReplyDeleteCheese sandwiches - $2.00
Handjobs - $10.00
Looking at the cute woman behind the counter, he asks: "Are you the one that gives the handjobs?"
She answers with a smile: "Yes, I am"
The man replies: "Well wash your hands and make me a cheese sandwich."
^ Lady leans over and whispers, "I'll do anything for $100."
ReplyDeleteFeller says, "Okay," drives her back to his place and says, "Paint my house."
(third-oldest joke I can remember)
That's why we have marriage. You can pay a woman to cook for you. You can pay a woman to clean for you. You can pay a woman to raise your children. You can pay a woman to do just about anything. Put if you pay her for nookie, they will put you in jai!
ReplyDeleteTim
Why do brides wear white?
ReplyDeleteBecause the dishwasher should match the refrigerator and stove.
Why do women have smaller feet than men?
So they can stand closer to the sink.
What do you say to a woman with two black eyes?
It doesn't matter what you say to her; you already know she doesn't fucking listen!
Moo-lin-yan Nabo-li-don