PIGS
A
salesman
is talking to a farmer. Suddenly, this energetic pig rushes out of the
barn, squealing happily and snuggling against the farmer. The pig has a
wooden leg. Curiosity finally gets to the salesman. He grins and asks:
“Why does this pig have a wooden leg?”
The farmer glares at the salesman and warns:
“You be
careful what you say about
this pig. This pig is real special. Let me tell ya, about a month ago
we had a fire up to the house. Wife and I were asleep. This pig right
here came racing across the field, banged his snout against the window
— we heard it, we were saved. That pig saved our lives!” The salesman’s
in awe. “Let me tell ya something else. Last week I was out plowing the
back forty. The tractor went up an incline, overturned and pinned me to
the ground. I couldn’t breathe. This pig … this pig right here dug me
out, pulled me out by the collar and gave me mouth-to-mouth
resuscitation! That pig saved my life.”
The salesman was thunderstruck. “Yeah,
but why does he have a wooden leg?”
The farmer snorted and rolled his eyes. “Are you crazy? You get a great pig like
this, you don’t wanna eat him all at once!”
|
|
Kinda like B. Milhous Obama's reltaionship with the 1%.
ReplyDeleteKinda like the three legged chicken. Ma liked a drumstick, Pa liked a drumstick, and Jr liked a drumstick. So they did some cross breeding and viola! No one knows what it tastes like thought. They cant catch it!
ReplyDeleteTim
A realy cheap guy owned a hog, and when he ran out of hog feed, he had to think of a way to feed the hog that didn't involve money. As luck would have it, his neighbor's apple tree had a fruited branch hanging over the fence line, but the apples hadn't fallen yet.
ReplyDeleteHis neighbor looks out his window and sees this mook standing under the branch, holding his hog up to the apples. So he wanders out to inquire what fresh hell was this.
Are you blind? asks the guy. I'm feeding my hog!
Well, uh, doesn't it take a long time like that? asks the neighbor.
So what? asks the guy. What's time to a hog?
Sir H the (I just buy more hog feed) Comet