Dying in July

If You Go to a Hospital in July, Get Ready to Die “ If you are reading these words from a hospital, chances are you either are about to or already have died. Very sorry that's how things shook out for you, but that's what you get for going to the hospital in July. "The July Effect" is one of those great hospital secrets like, "You can always ask for a butterfly needle" or, "Dr. Campbell and Dr. Fowler are having an affair" that doctors won't tell you outright but that you might pick up on anyway by eavesdropping on hospital workers' conversations. The rule holds that medical errors spike in summer because that's when residents, fresh out of medical school, start work at teaching hospitals. Being a doctor is one big game of Operation to these punks. You go in with a headache and all of a sudden they're trying to remove your Wish Bone with a pair of tweezers, being real, real careful not to touch the sides. The stethoscopes around their necks are made of plastic. Their doctor's coats are just one of their dad's white dress shirts. [Cont] Unless the election turns the right way, get ready for "The Obamacare Effect." ”