Gee Mom! It's UPSY DOODLE!

She meant Upsy Doodle
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Okay,
this invention is self explanatory because ALL OF YOU have experienced
the problem of getting the last gooey stuff out of jars. Not only
that, some foods like natural peanut butter have oil that rises
to the
top. Right? And no matter how much you stir it you end up
eating all
the oil before even half the peanut butter is gone and the rest
is dry
as a 5 day old dog turd. Am I right?
Well this idea, like
penicillin, is so simple that it's a wonder nobody has discovered it
until now. Am I right? With a lid at both ends you can just
oopsy doodle©™
it for easy access, or maintain proper balance of oils and emollients,
and save hundreds of dollars a year in the process!
I'm hoping all of you will help me create a buzz at GMA (Grocery
Mfrs
of Amer) meetings by asking store managers why they don't have stuff in
the Upsy-Doodle©™ Jars? Thank you.
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One might wonder how TRKF knows the moisture content of a 5 day old dog turd?
ReplyDeleteYou need to talk to the food packagers, not the store managers.
ReplyDelete(Love the pictorial captcha!)
65 Year marketing career tells me that pressure, or even interest, from the chains is the hammer in this instance.
ReplyDeleteI am holding in my hand as I type this (I watch a lot of porn, so I know how to type one-handed) a jar of "100% Natural Peter Pan Peanut & Honey Spread", which says, prominently, on the label, "NO need to STIR"!
ReplyDeleteThey (ConAgra Foods) lie like a fuckin' rug!
Moo-lin-yan Nabo-li-don
No spreads in our house last longer than a week, so the question is purely academic in our case. Even the Sam's Club-size jar of Jif (which doesn't separate, btw) seldom makes it past ten days.
ReplyDeleteBut Rodge is correct; if the major chains (e.g. Wal-Mart, Kroger, Safeway) want it, the manufacturers will make it happen.
The Oracle of Toit-ly has spoken. 'Nuff said.
ReplyDeleteI grovel before you guys' expertise.
ReplyDeleteSelah!
Upsy Doodle would have been a great business investment opportunity, but unfortunately, I put all of my disposable income into Slocum Pewters.
ReplyDeleteJust pour the peanut oil off the top of the Peter Pan Peanut Butter and fry your eggs in it.
ReplyDeleteBrought to you by the folks who inverted the labels on ketchup and mayo bottles to look like a clever new more-efficient dispensing package.
ReplyDeleteLooks like a good idea, but there'd be a large investment in new production machinery, so it'll be a you-first thing.
Also, it'll need a better name.
They now have a coating that keeps food from sticking to the inside of bottles.
ReplyDeletehttp://www.dailymail.co.uk/sciencetech/article-2356793/No-whacking-ketchup-bottle-Scientists-develop-non-stick-coating-help-sauce-slide-out.html
AWM
Ya mean that kids will no longer be taught the rhyme, "Shake, shake the ketchup bottle
ReplyDeleteLittle come, and then a lot'll!" ?
Ann Hedonia & Sam Paku
Ha, never heard that version of how to - never mind.
ReplyDeleteGolly gee whiz, is this stuff still an issue, here in the 21st Century when we have "life hacks" for everything? (we used to have "hints from Heloise" but no, now the same things are "hacks". Such moo-merde we live with.)
ReplyDeletePut most of a table knife down the neck of a new bottle of ketchup. Wiggle it around to open up a hole. Take the knife out. Use ketchup. Ketchup will flow smoothly the entire life of the contents.
Real natural peanut butter always separates. And it sucks to stir because the oil is filled right to the top. But it only comes in a small jar. So keep one old empty medium size regular peanut butter jar. Open the new natural one, flip it over and place it on the medium jar, and let it drain into the empty bigger jar. They fit together perfectly, every brand. Once drained in, stir it up and put the PB in the fridge. It won't separate ever.
Or, Demand Upsy DOODLE!
ReplyDelete