"If you're trying to change minds and influence people it's probably not a good idea to say that virtually all elected Democrats are liars, but what the hell."
"If the number of Islamic terror attacks continues at the current rate, candlelight vigils will soon be the number-one cause of global warming. "
Not THAT's funny and awesome! Thanks!
That's why your mother told you to chew your food well.
Not to be a downer, but this reminds me of a story from North Korea: "The unflinching account from a defector revealed how he picked corn kernels out of cow manure to eat ... " More at http://www.cnn.com/2013/05/10/world/asia/north-korea-gulag/
Reminds me of a barber shop joke:While the barber is lathering the man up for his shave, the man expresses to the barber how he has a hard time getting a close shave on his cheeks. The barber replies with a solution and pulls a small wooden ball out of this cabinet drawer. "Place the wooden ball between your cheek and gum on the right side and you will have a close shave on that side." The man does this, and the barber shaves the right side of his face. "Wow," exclaims the man, "that is great!" He puts the ball on the left side of his mouth, and with muffled voice asks, "Wht happons if I akkidentally swawo du bawll?" The barber says, "Just bring it back tomorrow like everyone else.
Lotsa folks know that Elvis died on "the throne". But they may not know what was his last utterance. He said, "Corn?"
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