Monday, July 31, 2006

Bob Byrd Chixken

How do we know this isn't Robert Byrd's KFC?

He'da writ ''Nigras will be charged an extry $1.50 ... ."

Law School Profiles

The candid Babs

Today's Celebrity Quote

''Being an idiot is making me look like a worn out hag from Hell" - Barbra Streisand

Iranian slug

Who watches the watchers in an Islamo Hellhole?
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Continent : Asia
Country : Iran, Islamic Republic of  (Facts)
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City : Iran
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Distance : 6,477 miles
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I'm a little teapot short and squat with no dick.

IDF hacks Nasrallah's TV channel
IDF intelligence hacked al-Manar  television and ridiculed Hizbullah's leader with the caption: 'Your days are numbered.'  ''Additionally, Hizbullah and al-Manar internet sites also received "special treatment" by Israeli technical specialists, and several were erased from the internet.''  Too bad the IDF didn't alert me, we coulda had so much fun. 

Jack's Hardon

The Johnny Reb Cannon commercial ...
... just below is sure to get liberal panties bunched up, if any come across it. This sample of today's appeal to kids, however, is ''good form.''

Blast that Yankee MOFO

When life was fun for everyone
TUA

How to ride a bike

Two young boys walk into a pharmacy one day, pick out a box of Tampax and proceed to the checkout counter. The man at the counter asks the older boy, "Son, how old are you?"
 
"Eight," the boy replies.
 
The man continues, "Do you know what these are used for?"
 
"Not exactly," the boy says. "But they aren't for me. They're for him. He's my brother. He's four. We saw on TV that if you use these you would be able to swim and ride a bike. Right now he can't do either one."
Juice

Re: Assholes

Kutz
A Professor was giving a lecture on "Involuntary Muscular Contractions" to his first year medical students. Realizing that this was not the most riveting subject, the Professor decided to give an example his students could relate to.
 
He pointed to a young woman in the front row and said, "Do you know what your ass hole is doing while you're having an orgasm?"
 
She replied, "He's probably golfing with his friends."
Juice

Euro Idiots

Why We Win
This guy used the Way Back Machine to view the Internet as it looked 10 years ago. Europings were worried about how to ''control'' the Internet even then. It's why they lose.

Reagan on the Lookout

Ted Kennedy wants to fix the courts

Rodge, I don't think it's possible for Ted Kennedy to say or do anything that would make him more of a caricature of himself than he already is.
Then you'd be wrong, Kopeckne Breath Gasper
chutz·pah also hutz·pah Pronunciation (tsp, ht-)
n.
Utter nerve; effrontery: "The confirmation process became broken because the Bush administration learned the wrong lesson from the failed Bork nomination " Edward Kennedy
SUPREME COURT CONFIRMATIONS

Roberts and Alito Misled Us

By Edward M. Kennedy
Sunday, July 30, 2006; Page B01

 I have had the honor of serving on the Senate Judiciary Committee for 43 years, during which I've participated in confirmation hearings for all the justices who now sit on the Supreme Court. Over that time, my colleagues and I have asked probing questions and listened attentively to substantive responses. Because we were able to learn a great deal about the nominees from those hearings, the Senate has rarely voted along party lines. Blah -blah-blah-blah-blah.
Jeffrey Lord manages to respond for us [Dear Senator Kennedy: Resigning to Reform] in a scholarly manner.  That is to say, he somehow is able to tweak this twit without once calling Mr. Kennedy a ''cowardly, cheating, low-life arrogant MFCS.''  I am impressed. 

Dear Senator Kennedy:

As comedienne Joan Rivers used to say: Can we talk????

Those of us who have been calling repeatedly for fundamental reform of what has become a corrupted judicial confirmation process can only read your July 30th op-ed in the Washington Post with astonishment.

Most amazingly, after decades of abuse of the process you are now calling for reform yourself. Having written a book (The Borking Rebellion) documenting the behind the scenes machinations of the Senate Judiciary Committee as viewed through the 2002 nomination brawl over now Third Circuit Judge D. Brooks Smith, I am pleased you have at last spoken to the subject.

Read and know.

Family Fortue by Kim duToit

A moving Victorian saga
It's been awhile since we vacationed as a family at the Outer Banks of North Carolina, but it used to be an annual event.  Like many of you I take the beach vacation opportunity to laze away doing nothing but read books, ride the surf (look at beach butt), and drink whiskey.  I purposely eschewed the computer to allow all this to happen. 

Each vacation is tabbed in my mind by a book I read.  There was the Flashman year at The Villas, and several Clancy summers when Tom  happened to publish his latest thriller just prior to our trip.  This year I read four books, but I believe that in the future I will designate this as the ''du Toit summer.'' 

The second book I read, on Tuesday when it rained the entire day, was Kim's Family Fortunes.  I did not put it down.  Could not.  I will say just a few things about it. 

Despite Kim's blog reputation as a man possessed by firearms, that passion does not in any way drive this narrative.  In fact, it will be as evenly received by the ladies as it was by me.  Set  against the backdrop of Victorian England, it contains the finest villainy and comeuppances, both sweet assignation and lusty  flesh pressings, and a coherent action filled story line.  My only disappointment was that John-John and Caroline never consummated.  I recommend it to one and all.  When the movie is made, I do think I'd make a perfect Roger.  Ahem. Well done Kim.  Very well done, in fact.

Hillary Bust

Cuzzin Ricky jolts me back to the real world. WTF?

Fundamentalist Democrats and Muslims

Cowards Cheat
When campaign lies told by Clinton during the 1992 campaign were uncovered (by Bob Woodward, if memory serves), George Stephanopoulos explained, and I paraphrase, ''We had to, his election was just too important.''  During the great 1994 Campaign Finance Law trashing by Clinton-Gore, Bill was caught on tape explaining to donors why he had to cheat.  "If we don't, the Republicans will outspend us and win.'' Like Fundo-Donks, fundamentalist Muslim Murderers excuse their cowardly practice of hiding behind women and children because their enemies have too much technology. Both groups share the same belief in the transcendency of their cause, and superiority of their respective religions, which excuses everything in their twisted minds. In both cases the American Drive-by Media are acquiescent.

Md-Va gas

Things we saw

Guess which state is run by Fundamentalist Democrats?

Bronze memorial

Mercy Killing
By happenstance our rented seaside manse overlooked the Ruzek Memorial in Kill Devil Hills, NC. This bronze celebrates the the action of Willy Ruzek, who, upon learning James Earl Carter had been elected President of the United States, threw his seven children into freezing seas. We left flowers.

Condi's dumb

Make that ''Sheer stupidity''
GOOD IDEA
BAD IDEA
Israel takes full advantage of Hezbollah's miscalculation and kills every one of them.  Every one.

Nags Head Pup

While you slept
Reagan the Wonder Dog sweeps the morning beach for Islamo terrorist MOFOs. Local residents have not a clue as to the source of their well being this day.

Sunday, July 30, 2006

Eye Dropper

Brainstorm!

I'm really excited about this one ... just need a little venture capital.

Sunday, July 23, 2006

Something Funny

These will amuse you during the coming week.
Something Funny 1
Something Funny 2
Something Funny 3
Something Funny 4
Something Funny 5

Absence

Notice of Intent
Mother Superior and I will this week fulfil a life long dream and tryout for the U.S. Synchronous Swimming Team. There will be no posting until next Monday (July 31st). Two of our kids will man the fort here, god help us. If you see naked people running on the lawn, tell them I said ''stop that.'' Thanks.

Saturday, July 22, 2006

Volks Jet

Jet Powered & Street Legal
Dr. Hardcrab

Hot Cally

I was thinking 112º, but what do I know?

Obama Rama not running for President? Stop the Press!


Stop the press.

Air conditioner magic

USA USA!

One man's arm-y

America loves a whiny dicklikker

Fist power

Team America's Hans Blix

Today's ''Don't Dare F**K with the U.N." Tale
Colorful Language Warning

Pee Helpers

After being thrown from a horse and spraining both wrists, I can honestly say ... AWK!

Caffiene death

Suicide -by-caffiene help line

Gator god

I see an alternative to Scientology coming ...

Guitar method

Toe tapping and cool too

Google Earth does Kim Jong Il

I see London, I see France ..

Another New York Times eats shit cartoon

Weaks Horses

Weak Horses and Cowards too.
Bush and Blair were, famously, caught on an open mike at the G-8 summit in St. Petersburg. Blair demonstrated a shrewd understanding of what was at stake for Syria's dictator, Bashar Assad: "He thinks if Lebanon turns out fine, if we get a solution in Israel and Palestine, Iraq goes in the right way . . . he's done." And Bush explained, simply and correctly, that the first step was "to get Hezbollah to stop doing this s---."

Israel is fighting to stop, and defeat, Hezbollah. Bush, Blair, and the Post editors understand that the right policy is to stand behind Israel, and to support that nation in defeating terror--for its own sake, and on behalf of liberal civilization. They understand that we are at war with an axis of jihadist-terrorist organizations and the states that sponsor them. They understand that we need to win the war. With Bush's leadership, we have a good chance to do so.

--William Kristol [Weak Horses]

Robert Kuttner and visual pheromones

That icky feeling you sense?
First, today's science.  We are now aware of the power of pheromones, the special underground smells we emit that are sensed by receptors in members of the opposite sex noses, and make them wild to do you on the spot. They're why you fell in love with the plain looking girl who sat next to you in English, and couldn't figure out why (because pheromone knowledge hadn't been invented back then). But, did you know there are visual pheromones too, and that I discovered them? It's true. Take Robert Kuttner, shown above. Most normal people will look at him and have an unexplainable urge to slap him. Why? Visual pheromones. They let us make somewhat reliable judgments about people we meet, but know nothing about. Like in this case the warning sent to your brain is "Asshole Asshole Asshole.Leftwing Asshole."  Of course if you're an asshole yourself it will not be so much a warning that's sent as an invitation to blurt out stuff like ''I wish I could kill Bush.'' Is that all clear? I'm going to patent it. Oh, about Kuttner.

Globe's Kuttner: Bush 'Lying Heir to the Lunatic Fringe'

Limo Camper

USA USA

Friday, July 21, 2006

Today's Idiot Then

Taepodong Democrats

Okay Rodge, I've seen a few of your posts portraying democrats as talented cat owners, excelling in the arts, and passable as minor functionaries, but by nature incapable of thinking strategically, understanding money creation, or fathoming national defense. Isn't that a bit harsh? Maybe they've changed?
Wrong Madeleine Albright Crotch Breath

Taepodong Democrats

Cow story

There's a moral here, but what?

Hollywood Fearful for Its Industry

Today's Good News
Before movies ceased being an enjoyable escape from life's misfortunes, and instead served to remind me of the latest leftist political  nincompoopery emanating from someone on the screen, my bride and I would attend, on average, about 20 times a year.  Let's call that $400 ($20.00 x 20) in lost box office that the entertainment industry suffered last year - from just one family. Let's suppose that there are 10 million like-minded folks out there - a not unreasonable figure; that comes to $4,000,000,000.  4 Billion smackolas!! before throwing in lost movie rentals. Which brings us to this:

Hollywood Fearful for Its Industry

Ha-freaking-Ha


Yeah yeah yeah, I've said this all  before.  Didn't stick.  Maybe now.

Library Masturbator

Rat Bastards
I was looking for something else on a very large site when this embedded video auto-started. The thing is, I could only hear the audio, and it made me nuts trying to find the video screen, which I eventually did. After watching it, I am more sickened by Cleveland ''investigative reporter'' Carl Monday, and his station's management than the target. Too bad the kid's father didn't beat him half to death. Sheesh.

Oh yes, I think it would have been appropriate to charge the little perv with public indecency.