Clinical depression is a terrible affliction, but there is a bright side - not compensating, to be sure - but something. Here are examples of how the depressed person has an advantage over you.
| The News |  Seratonin Enabled |
 Skipped Prozac |
| DR.: I'm sorry Mrs. Jones, but you only have a week to live | Mrs. Jones: (sobbing) OMFG! |
Mrs. Jones: Can we hurry things along? |
| Wife: I'm leaving you Harry |
Harry: What? What can I do to make you change your mind? I'll change. I'll do anything. |
Harry: Take the cat. |
| Boss: Sally, your work has been totally unsatisfactory. We're letting you go. |
Sally: What? What can I do to make you change your mind? I'll change. I'll do anything. | Sally: Go fuck yourself. |
| Coach: Dick, WTF are you doing? You didn't even try to block your man! |
Dick: Coach,
I'm sorry. I ate Mexican last night, and I have an emerging
problem here. I'm afraid if I move, I'll crap my pants. |
Dick: Go fuck yourself. |
| Bulletin: The meteor is just 11 minutes away from crashing into North America and destroying us. |
People: ''Please God, get me out of this and I'll start going to church, I swear I will.'' |
People: HA! Die, you liberal motherfuckers!!! |
| Prosecutor: We will prove that Mr. Harris raped my client . |
Defense Attorney: Ladies and Gentlemen of the jury, my client takes Prozac, so he could not possibly have penetrated Ms. Petirie.. |
Mr. Harris: Oh shit (Whoops, mixed bag, that.) |
