Congressional Bunker

Today's Secret

This morning  the History Channel ran a deal on cold war era missile silos, etc., and the bunker under the Greenbrier Hotel, in WV, that was designed to house Congress during a nuclear attack.  Its existence was compromised in 1993 by an investigative reporter, so it became a tourist attraction (I guess because  angry citizens would know where to dig).   The History Channel guy is taken on a tour of the rather sumptuous digs.  "And here's where Senators and Representatives could manage government during the crisis," explains the guide.  And I'm thinking, are you kidding me?  In the event of  an all-out attack on the United States, the best thing would be to collapse the roof on these carbuncles before they could lose the war.  To show how serious I am about this, here's the location of the new secret bunker (I can't disclose how I got it, that's top secret). It's located in a huge complex below Jo-Jo's Donut Shack, 430 South Capitol St., SE. Bill Clinton picked the site in 1994 while he was banging a donut maker named Murleen at Jo-Jo's. In case of an attack, that's where our congress critters will be hiding.  Rent "The Dirty Dozen" for ideas.  (Make a copy of this, then burn it).