Here's what happened Halloween night and yesterday, and I'm not making this up.
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 When
I wake in the middle of the night (often) I get back to sleep by
listening to XM radio. It has to be real low so MoSup isn't
disturbed. Wednesday I woke at 3:40 and turned it on. Suddenly,
the volume went to jet engine decibel level. I hit the
lower button, but it didn't just go down to the level I wanted, it
went mute. If I adjusted up, it went all the way up,
blah-blah-blah until I just turned it off. In the morning it
worked normally.
- I put my Dancing Homer on the porch Wednesday
night. MoSup made him a mask (that left him looking more like a
yellow porn star than dangerous), and the trick-treaters loved him. Many
came back with their parents, and a great time was had by all.
Dancing Homer is 5' tall, and motion activated. Once triggered, he randomly spits out one of an available 100, or so, pithy sayings ("Nuts. is there anything they can't do?), or goes into a dance routine , i.e. Shake your Booty, complete with gyrations.
Afterwards, I put Homer
back in the sun room. All day yesterday, and continuing yet, he
was triggered by some mysterious movement at irregular moments.
- Last night I was heating oil for fried fish and onion
rings. I went to the pantry for something.
CRASH! The cast iron chicken fryer had jumped off the
stove, splattering its load of red hot oil all over the damn
place. What a mess.
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So, poltergeists? When Dancing Homer began hollering and dancing at
3:15 AM last night I had a flash vision. This was no poltergeist. This was some evil, dead
ratbastardcommieMoFo who has it in for me for exposing his evil ways. My immediate mental list consisted of
the living; Carter, Ted, the Clintons, Howard Metzenbaum, etc. I
needed a dead guy, and in another flash it came to me. I hollered out:
I command you in the name of Jesus Christ to leave this house and return to Hell Roger Nash Baldwin!!!
So far so good.
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