Newlywed games

Games

Newly married, we frequently played the Newlywed Game with our friends, all of whom had been married for several years.  We waxed them every time.  On the way home we talked smugly about how much more in tune we were than they.  In retrospect, I know that our masterful performance was due mostly, if not entirely, to our relative inexperience with one another.  To illustrate, here are some of the questions that were posed. “ Ladies what would your husband say is your favorite outfit, excluding what you are wearing tonight. Hell, she only had one - the mini-nurse uniform with knee high boots. ” What is the strangest gift your spouse has ever bought for you? Had to be the Pocket Fishernan. What percentage of the housework would your husband say he does? Are you shi**ing me?  "Zero, Bob."  Even if I did half, the man code required that response, and of course the girl code requires them to believe it. What was the best vacation you’ve ever taken together? Only had one, our honeymoon. Yawn. When my wife wakes up in the morning she’s likely to find my __ on her __ . Today it could be: socks; dresser underpants; picture of Aunt Helen pillow; face Back then, however, sheesh.  Could only be one thing, right? I'm sure you've had the same experience.  The longer you live together, the harder it is to know what she's thinking.  For instance.  Just now I read her that Enzyte comment (you'll come to it a few posts down).  Do you know what she said?  What's Enzyte?  She had never,  not one time, seen the commercial.  I showed her several screen caps I have of it.  Nope.  Had no idea.  How could this happen?  She said, 'They never show it on the shows I watch," in an accusatory tone.  Like the History and Discovery channels are porn?  Arrgghhhh. I'm taking it in the butt here, Bob!