Thursday, May 08, 2008

Sigh

It's not all fun and games being 110

“ An old man goes into a drug store to buy some Viagra.

"Can I have 6 tablets, cut in quarters?"

"I can cut them for you" said the pharmacist, "but a quarter tablet will not give you a full erection."

"I know", said the old man. "I don't want an erection. I just want it sticking out far enough so I don't piss on my slippers."
 ”
5/08/2008 01:34:00 PM 7 Comments

"If the number of Islamic terror attacks continues at the current rate, candlelight vigils will soon be the number-one cause of global warming. "
Argus Hamilton


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7 comments:

Juice said...

HA! That's just great. :D

5/8/08, 2:33 PM
Juice said...

Have you ever spoken and the minute it leaves your mouth, you realize you've just embarrassed yourself?

Scene: Oyster Bar on Angel Island, SF. Son orders BBQ'd oysters as well as raw, but these things are huge. And, I've never done the raw oyster thing before...decided to pass.

Dialog, Juice to bartender:
If I'm going to swallow something for the first time, it's gonna have to be alot smaller than that. OUCH! ta-dum-bum

5/8/08, 2:42 PM
Rodger the Real King of France said...

clap*clap*clap!

5/8/08, 4:22 PM
Anonymous said...

Juice,

Those pacific oysters are huge and taste bland as all get-out. Nothing like oysters from the Chesapeake.

5/8/08, 4:27 PM
Juice said...

Thanks Ken. Just one more reason for me to visit the East Coast! Petite oysters. :)

5/8/08, 4:58 PM
Rodger the Real King of France said...

What you want are Chincoteague "arsters." The waters around that Chesapeake Bay island (VA) have the perfect salinity, temperature, and night life for them, so some arstermen dump their catch there for a while before harvesting them again.

I was in Boston once, and after eating my oysters I asked the waiter if they were Chinks? He shrugged, and said he'd ask the chef. A few minutes later the chef comes to our table, and says, yes, they were Chincoteagues, and thank you for noticing. Four packs of cigs a day, and all, I could tell.

5/8/08, 6:42 PM
BlogDog said...

I dunno Juice. John McCain expects us to swallow the idea that he's conservative. That's more than I've been able to wrtap my lips around yet.
I may have to take that one as a suppository. I mean: suppose it's true and bear down hard.

5/8/08, 6:49 PM

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