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Barack
Obama, not the smartest turd in the punch bowl, here forgets
himself and agrees to this near fatal beach scene photo-op.
Reconstructive surgery using pig feces was required.
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...
extra-terrestrials have visited Earth on several occasions - but the
alien contact has been repeatedly covered up by governments for six
decades.
Chillingly, he claimed our technology is "not nearly as sophisticated"
as theirs and "had they been hostile", he warned "we would be been gone
by now".
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Their
technology may be more sophisticated, but in a classic screw-up by
people who are smarter than everyone else,
aliens assumed their own experiences translated into a universal
truth. Let me explain. I've studied this for a long time,
and what I'm about to reveal here is backed up by my findings.
 Hundreds,
nay-nay thousands of people have come forward with startlingly similar
tales of their abduction by aliens. Virtually all claim to have
been anally probed.
They were.
These oh-so-smart aliens
crossed their DNA with fecal matter to produce their Earthly
surrogates! By 1992, using mind control technology beamed from hovering
mother ships, they "elected" their first mature specimen to our
nation's highest elected office. Today alien turds occupy
high positions in media, education, and comprise 100% of the democrat
party, including of course the Speaker of the House, Nancy
"Hankey" Pelosi. And, with second generation super turd Barry Obama,
they are poised to turn us all into mindless Muslim lunkhead aliens
like them.
Can we fight the
menace? You bet we can. Because of their flawed genetics, these
shit-heads (sorry, but that is the technical term) rely on real
Americans being as stupid as they. The solution then is to simply
reject their crappy message. It's that simple. A second solution,
of course, is a wet one. Hose them down, and they'll melt into
little piles of corn and tomato seed.
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