Thursday, January 15, 2009

Run Like a Man

Barn Army Memo
Without naming names, this is  letter is representative of others I've received from many, many Barn Army women.
Dear Supreme Commander S.H.Long:

I can't thank you enough for including me in the ranks of America's Barn Army regulars.  I particularly like that you make no distinction between men and women, even to the point of having group showers and latrines.  But here's where I'd like some help.  During our bayonet charge drills, for instance, I can't help noticing that we girls run like, well, girls.  Is there some trick that will give us that same swaggering, heroic-like motion?

Thanks ever so much,
Samurai ... (name deleted).
Thanks for your question (name deleted).  Yes, you'll need two boiled and peeled eggs and one of those mesh onion sacks
Works like a charm

6 comments:

Anonymous said...

Don't forget to tape a flashlight or a banana to your thigh.
Lt. Col. Gen. Tailgunner dick

oooooh password = incyte

B....... said...

My uncle was an old time strongman for the Barnum & Bailey Circus. That happened to him once when he tried to jerk 1200 lbs of concrete rails.

Anonymous said...

The gals want to be treated like the fellas then we guys don't wear bras and will go shirtles at the drop of a hat and we will without thinking pee on a tree. And nobody's ever said I run like a girl. So, they need to do things like that.

-Kelly

closed said...

It ain't the hardware up front ... it's the hips.

If a baby's head will fit through them, then you are just going to have to run like that.

If you can run like a man, then your first pregnancy had better end in a c-section.

Anonymous said...

Reminds me of this vintage cartoon.
GrinfilledCelt

Ride Fast said...

Walking is for animals, assign them to Armor.

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