Pam's watch and a gun Saint.

Patron Saint Story

MoFux just sent me an e-mail asking, "Rodge, do you pray for the intersession of saints?"  Yes I do, every time I think I'm about to die, or the Terps are about to lose. MoSup's patron saint is St. Jude Thaddeus, and she is devoted to him in that oddly Catholic way that protestants don't understand.  I had two patron saints as a kid. St. Patrick - my confirmation name after my best friend Pat Stack.  And my go-to saint was St. Christopher, normally the patron saint of travelers. Here's why.  Has not changed a bit! And this is incredible that I can do this (for myself, but you're welcome to tag along).  We were playing softball on this field  behind the terminus of the Addison St. bus line.  My neighbor Pam D, whom I had a secret crush on from the first time I met her (me aged 7, her 8 - an impossible hurdle) until she accidentally electrocuted herself when I was 14. Where was I?  Right.   Playing ball. When she got home, she noticed her birthday watch was missing.  We had a kid's version of Code Orange, which meant help some other kid in trouble, so we all went back to the field, and searched.  Must have been 15-16 of us.   It was getting dark, and it looked like it would remain lost, at least this day, and then Pammy broke into tears .  That girl thing that always works.   She had a new deal.  Whoever found her watch would get to go to her dad's restaurant for a free hamburger and milkshake.   HFS!  Winning the admiration of your secret love, and a milkshake too?  Boner (if I coulda)!  I made a silent vow to St, Christopher.  "If you let me find it, I'll wear the cloth scapularIt itched. and not the metal one cool guys wore this outside their tee-shirt. ."  The cloth one had more "magic," but itched in hot weather, and the metal one was cool looking (Latinos and Italians wear gold ones).  And-  guess what?  That's right. I found the damned thing almost immediately.  STG.  Where the "X" is.  So, St. Christopher became my guy, up until the Church purged him from the universal list of saints because he didn't have all his papers. And I wore my cloth scapula until it broke and I lost it. And I never was invited to the restaurant, and was too shy to mention it. But, that's not what I wanted to tell you about.  This is. It's about making St. Gabriel Francis Possenti, a 19th-century Passionist monk, the patron saint of guns.  And, he has all his papers. I vote yes, and he will immediately be the patron saint of this blog too.  Maybe keep me from cursing, and talking about nipples. And I'll shoot tight groups at 50 yards.