Sunday, May 25, 2014


I can chop a chiffonade rather handily, and I can flip stuff in a skillet; but mincing garlic?  Television chefs throw a little salt on a butcher's block, spank a clove once with the back of the knife, and with a half dozen wrist actions grind that boy into a nice mince.  But when I do it the clove is likely to squirt out and fly off the block, and after several chops it still hasn't been reduced to something that can be ground in the salt.  I know what you're saying. Garlic Press.


I've tried several garlic presses and they all blow. Just recently America's Test Kitchen  compared garlic presses and the best  cost c. $30. Get real.   On Friday I was making roasted Brussels sprouts.  When it came to the garlic mincing I picked up my microplane and HFS!  Perfect.  Why did it take me so long to figure out something so obviously simple?  In case you haven't, now you know.  You're welcome.

Wait. Now I've got to try this one in case I want to show off.  But the micro plane is still faster, and better.


    Must Eat Brains                     


Putting 2+2 together I've come up with a theory about why Microsoft, who have included in every Windows version until Windows 8, a game of Hearts that increasingly ignores the rules.  More to the point, why at some point, around Windows 5, did the game increasingly cheat until now, with Window's  7, it's a joke.  And even more to the point, why am I and others still playing it?

 My hypothesis is that the Feds, maybe the NSA, maybe the FBI, or even the DNC, payed Bill Gates to use it as a behavioral study with the aim of seeing how players react after long periods of abuse.  Do they quit at first insult, or even notice the renege? Do they return?  How often? The data are uploaded with every Windows update; compiled,  and algorithms are developed that will quickly identify IQ, patience, docility, and of course the player's identity.  For what?  For the purpose of finding tomorrow's useful idiots, and likely stimuli to keep them happy and functional until they are no longer needed. 

I know what you're thinking, but no.  I've kept at it as part of my doctoral thesis (if I ever need one) on how our culture is now so rancidly immoral that even card cheating is accepted; its causes, and future ramifications.    

goodbye how are you?

Oh My
the dog ate my homework

.... and a horrible code, and a broken computer, and recitals,  and  social functions, and ennui.  Refunds on request.