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            Saturday, January 02, 2016

Res Ipsa Loquitur
Commit to memory; Be a hero to your
kids/grandkids— girls at the single bar

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            Dad Jokes Posted by Rodger the Real King of France | 1/02/2016 12:10:00 PM | PERMALINK Back Link (10) | Send This Post | HOME


"The MSM Rule of Inverse Electoral Correlation:
The closer the presidential race gets, the louder the MSM declares that it’s over. And all this comes even as Clinton has had a terrible week—arguably her worst week ever, as the billowing smoke of financial scandal clouds herself and her family."

Good fun. Good laughs. Took me here -

She's been married so many times she has rice marks on her face.
Henny Youngman

A recent survey showed that 6 out of seven dwarves are not Happy.
The roundest knight at King Arthur's round table was Sir Cumference. He acquired his size from too much pi.

I thought I saw an eye doctor on an Alaskan island, but it turned out to be an optical Aleutian.

The butcher backed into the meat grinder and got a little behind in his work.

Two silk worms had a race. They ended up in a tie.

Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana.

I wondered why the baseball kept getting bigger. Then it hit me.

A sign on the lawn at a drug rehab center said: 'Keep off the Grass.'

The short fortune-teller who escaped from prison was a small medium, at large.

Did you hear about the woman who backed into a fan? Disaster.
Don't ever try to tell a pun to a kleptomaniac. They'll take it literally.

What a list; I will rule!
Sometimes all you need is the punchline, e.g., "Rectum? Damn near killed 'im!" or "No, No, Nurse! I said prick his boil!"

Stu Tarlowe aka The Joke Wrangler
Lady to hardware store clerk:
"I need a 3/8" nut, please".
Clerk: "Do you want a screw for that?"
Lady: "No, but I'll blow you for that toaster over there!"

Phil N. LeBlanc
There was a young man who's Dad told him to go to Cox's to get a seer sucker suit but he slipped up and went to Sears.
Those are so awful.

I can't wait to use them on my kids.
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