Wednesday, September 07, 2016

Japanese fart scroll

art is everywhere                                                   

As the comedian Louis CK once expounded, you don’t have to be smart to laugh at farts. But you would have to be stupid not to. And he gives some fairly convincing reasons why the fart is the perfect joke: it comes out of your ass, it smells like poop because it’s been hanging out next to it all day long, and it announces itself with a toot noise when it comes out.
Of course, Louis CK wasn’t the first to realize the inherent comedic effect of farts. And since today is National Pass Gas Day, I thought it would be appropriate to recall one of the most epic acts of flatulent artistry. Over 150 years ago a group of anonymous Japanese artists created a 34-ft long scroll titled He-Gassen (屁合戦), literally: “Fart Battle.”
The scroll, which was created during the Edo Period (probably around 1846) in Japan, consists of roughly 15 different scenes depicting people directing their farts at other people or objects. There are people farting at each other. There are people farting through objects. There are people combating farts with fans. There are bags of farts being released. Trees and cats get blown away by farts. And the scroll culminates with a divine gust of flatulence knocking over a ceremony and causing complete and utter chaos.

Horry Clap!  I thought I was being original.  Guess Not.

" ... rampant abuse of data."

"The MSM Rule of Inverse Electoral Correlation: The closer the presidential race gets, the louder the MSM declares that it’s over. "

Data are important to understanding everything in politics, from polling to policy. But data are also very easy to abuse and misuse. You can manipulate polls to make them say pretty much anything you want, such as that Hillary Clinton is leading Donald Trump in Texas or that 7 percent of Texans want a border wall with Oklahoma. 

And then there is the dubious field of fact-checking, which is often politicized. "Our pollsters and our media have spent plenty of time and column inches this year engaged in this sort of inhumane torture"

Spell 'CAT' Amy ..

Schumer questioned critics of Trump’s opponent Democratic presidential nominee Hillary Clinton, calling the people that “aren’t informed.
  aren’t informed.Too-too  precious. Another Hollywood asshat who thinks somebody cares what they do.  There was a brief moment when I thought Amy Schumer was funny.  That time has, long ago, passed.  The only thing keeping her at all relevant is  ? Hell if I know.

This must be Detroit ....

What happens when you shut
conservatives out of your governing body? 

What will happen if the city of Detroit loses another 25 percent of their population?
The City Council will change the city's nickname from Motown to left town.

Now that the governor has  filed for chapter 9 bankruptcy for Detroit, he's working on a plan B.
Unfortunately the "B" stands for bake sale.

What's  the difference between a person from Detroit in a baby?
A  baby will stop whining after a while.

What's  the only thing that grows in Detroit?
The crime rate.

How do you know that the Detroit's finances are a complete mess?
al Qaeda is trying to find a way to take credit for it.

Why did the Detroiter think he saw a ghost on Halloween? 
He saw a kid dressed up as a pension plan.

What are McDonald's employees now asking customers in Detroit? 
"Can you afford fries with that?"

What is Trump's solution to Detroit's financial crisis?  
Waterboarding  the City Council.

How bad is the economy in Detroit? 
A Motor City casino was turned into an Indian reservation.

What do you call a couple hits from the crack pipe in Detroit?

How do you answer the door in Detroit?
With the shotgun.

What do you call an arsonist in Detroit?
An "urban renewal specialist."

What do you call a person with the job in Detroit?

What's the difference between the mayor of Detroit in a prostitute? 
The prostitute gives value for the money she takes.

How do people in Detroit vote? 
Early and often.

How do you castrate a person from Detroit?
Kick his sister in the mouth.

What's the difference between a person from Detroit in a car? 
One is a bottom-feeding scum sucker, and the other is a fish.

What do people from Detroit and a bottle of beer have in common?
They're both empty from the neck up.

How do you know you are in Detroit? 
You pull up to a red light and roll up your windows.

Did you hear about the power outage in the Detroit library? 
Thirty  people were stuck on the escalator for three hours.

What does the average student from Detroit get on his SAT? 

How do you promote  safe-sex in Detroit? 
Place  signs on the animals that kick.

Why do Detroit retailers  sell so many button fly jeans in Detroit?
Because the sheep can hear the zippers a mile away.

What is the definition other Detroit virgin?
An ugly 12-year-old who can outrun her brothers.

What do tornadoes and people from Detroit have in common?
They both end up in trailer parks.

What happens when you shut conservatives out of your governing body? 

What's the first thing a Detroit girl does when she wakes up in the mornong?
She  walks home.

Why don't girls play hide-and-seek in Detroit?
No one would look for them.

What's the advantage of being married to a person from Detroit? 
You  can park in handicapped zones.

How do you know that Michael Jackson is not dead?
He's still registered to vote in Detroit.

Why is Detroit trying to keep their new stadium a secret from  the public?
They're afraid the Tigers will find out where it is and try to play there.

I see this volcano ...

The punishment for riding on the same bike as a boy

Like FDR appointing a Nisei  to the court in 1943,Wot?
Just another stick in our eye.