Wednesday, June 20, 2007

Today's science

The formula is: N = C + {fb (cm) . fb (tc)} + fb (Ts) + fc . ta, where N=force in Newtons required to break the cooked bacon, fb=function of the bacon type, fc=function of the condiment/filling effect, Ts=serving temperature, tc=cooking time, ta=time or duration of application of condiment/filling, cm=cooking method, C=Newtons required to break uncooked bacon.
6/20/2007 06:10:00 PM 7 Comments

"If the number of Islamic terror attacks continues at the current rate, candlelight vigils will soon be the number-one cause of global warming. "
Argus Hamilton


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7 comments:

Anonymous said...

Butty?????

mary

6/20/07, 6:46 PM
Rodger the Real King of France said...

New one on me too.

6/20/07, 6:51 PM
Anonymous said...

Now see, that's the kind of cutting edge science that that American scientists should be doing. It's that type of research that made, and keeps the British Empire at the forefront...oh, wait...nevermind. Oh well, on the bright side they are working on the perfect BACON sandwich.
-embycil

6/20/07, 8:04 PM
Anonymous said...

You won't find this kind of cutting-edge research taking place in Dubai . . . .

6/20/07, 9:12 PM
Anonymous said...

Bacon butty comes before the Spotted Dick.

Tally Ho

6/20/07, 10:41 PM
Anonymous said...

First the academics deconstructed (and thereby ruined) orchestral music, visual art, and poetry.

Now they wish to ruin the art of cooking. Notice that they start with food that can't get much worse- English food. No one will complain as they "improve" the butty, fish and chips, and shepherd's pie.

I know how the story ends: with the entirety of haute cuisine reduced to several varieties of tapioca pudding, all alike in taste, distinguished only by their names: "1000 Dead Republicans", "Bukkake Christ", etc...

6/21/07, 12:20 AM
Anonymous said...

I tried to read this, I really did. Couldn't get past the first line:

Experts at Leeds University discovered the secret to the ideal sandwich lay in how crispy and crunchy rashers were.

6/21/07, 1:02 AM

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