Wednesday, July 07, 2010

Aw, knots!

Knots to You
Lost knowledge: ropes and knots

I took a piece of plywood and painted it black. Then, using my Boy Scout handbook as a guide, tied clothesline (remember that?) into several examples, which were then nailed to the board.  My mom said it was just wonderful.  Alas, that Boy Scout project didn't win squat in the contest; so much for stupid knots. 

It wasn't until I took up sailing in the '80's that actually knowing how to tie knots, and quickly, became a necessary art form; I become a practitioner, and then expert knotster.  There is something deeply satisfying in knowing how to tie the right knot, at the right time.  It also seems to summon forth from women some ancient  racial memory of being in in the company of a manly man.  Makes them shudder amidships. 

Here's everything you'll ever need to know about knots. I have no more use for them.  Sigh.
Well, maybe  this one .

7/07/2010 09:03:00 AM 10 Comments

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10 comments:

Jess said...

Someone found one of those useful knots in a local industrial facility. Panic ensued and the last report was that it was outlawed in the facility and failure to obey this rule would result in immediate termination.

7/7/10, 9:11 AM
Anonymous said...

Jess, from what I've seen, those knots are like farts. He who found it, bound it. Just about every time, it was placed by the very person who was so outraged to discover it. But that's not the part you hear about in the news. "Noose found on campus!!" they scream, but they under-report the followup that reveals it was a hoax.

7/7/10, 9:40 AM
Jess said...

Maybe so. I'm sure there are at least a half dozen people in the facility that deperately need to address, and refocus, the hate they generate by being totally enraptured with their anal sphinters.

7/7/10, 9:57 AM
JMcD said...

Neatest thing I personally ever saw done with rope was watching a guy splice two ropes together.
When he through and pounded and rolled the rope you could barely detect where the splice was located......Damn neat work.

7/7/10, 10:01 AM
Anonymous said...

My gg-grandfather had a ropewalk in Baltimore, and I've often wondered what went on there. Thanks Roger
Lt. Col. Gen. Tailgunner dick

7/7/10, 10:12 AM
Anonymous said...

Marlinspike seamanship. Learned the basics in bootcamp but didnt use it much as an Aircrewman.
Tim

7/7/10, 10:16 AM
Anonymous said...

In my brief stint as a Boy Scout I had the experience of making rope by hand from bailing twine, which we then used at a jamboree. Impressed the other troops. Now, few boys know what bailing twine is.

I'm an advocate of having parachute cord and/or rope in the emergency kits- there's no substitute for it. Along with that you need to know a few basic knots.

AWM

7/7/10, 10:26 AM
Anonymous said...

Knots and knotholes. Checkout this Upshot-Knothole test.

oy vey ole'

7/7/10, 10:40 AM
Anonymous said...

I tied a monkey fist the other day , and used one of my ex wife's Ben Wa Balls for the weight in the center ! ( I s#!+ you not ) Then I tied a neat little noose on the trailing end of the line ( to secure it around your wrist ) Everyone who walks by it picks it up and starts swinging it ! My girlfriend wanted to hang it in her office (she has no idea what's inside) I ought to start selling the damned things : ) smibsid

7/7/10, 4:30 PM
DougM said...

I own five or six really fine books on marlinspike seamanship. Used a bunch of it single-handing for three+ years after I retired from the AF. I still teach folks how to coil and secure a line for tossing into a locker or hanging on the horn of a mast cleat, even for electrical wire. When I taught sailing, it was my pass/fail test. Always gets awed respect, simple as that is.

7/7/10, 4:56 PM

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