Wednesday, October 20, 2010

Turkish Baths for congressmen, JFC

    "Sun Light Shower Baths to
Pep up Weary Congressmen"
  CONGRESSMEN in Washington now resort to sun light baths in the Turkish baths of the House of Representatives office building when they become jaded. Weary from their intensive work and political worries congressmen find that these sun baths restore their “pep.” The lights, when the treatment is taken for ten minutes each day, give the patient the same benefits as if he were spending a couple of weeks at one of the southern winter resorts. Not only do the lights invigorate, but they also give the patient an artificial tan. These same kind of lights were used to treat the King of England. The busy men do not; find it necessary to disrobe to derive the full benefit of the sun shower baths and seated before the showers the health-giving rays bathe them from head to waist. Masks are worn over the eyes as a protection from the powerful rays.

 JFC! How pamprered can you get.  Sunlight baths, indeed. Such high faluting language for tanning salon, for a bunch of  twig eatin', tofu fartin', lily livered, Prius driving, America-hating, bleeding heart liberal, blinkered, Starbucks drinking, elitist, can't-we-all-just-get-along, granola eating, namby-pamby, Birkenstock wearing, tree hugging, long haired, pansy-assed, kumbaya-singing, Earth First, bed-wetting, patchouli wearing, dirty, smelly, dope smoking, bongo playing, armpit shaved men crying "Mother Earth is Gaia ... .   oh - never mind.

12 comments:

DougM said...

Oh,
for a minute, there, I thought this was about the need for investigations into congressional corruption.

JMcD said...

Will that light kill cooties?

Anonymous said...

Can't we all just get a long gun?
mary

Anonymous said...

Damn Rodg, dont pop a vein.
Tim

Bryan said...

I thought turds shriveled in the sun?

Jess said...

I was trying to write a snarky comment but found all I could think of was "Fu** them and the horse they rode in on."

Mabye we can pump sleeping gas in to the rooms and turn half of them into jerky.

Rodger the Real King of France said...

Did anyone follow the link? 1929?

Anonymous said...

These are the same people who outlawed the incandescent light bulb? They put a tax on tanning salons with some ridiculous 'protection of minors' rules because of the health risks? Now they use those tax dollars... 1929? Never mind.

jr

Chuck Martel said...

Let me get this straight. We have a hammam in the House of Representatives? Since when? And where is it?

Anonymous said...

"Pep" ..."PEP"??!?!

*pfaff* Now-a-daze we have pills for that.

e~C

Juice said...

Depends. Before or after October 29, 1929. Did they share the lights with the rest of weary America?

DougM said...

"Florian?"

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