Thursday, February 16, 2012

A Fine Mortality Tale

Tails of the Gun

A Mortality Play


Res Ipsa Loquitur

You\'re walking down a deserted street with your wife and two small children. Suddenly, a dangerous looking man with a huge knife comes around the corner, locks eyes with you, screams obscenities, raises the knife, and charges. You are carrying a Glock .40 and you are an expert shot. You have mere seconds before he reaches you and your family. What do you do?

Liberal Answer:

Well, that\'s not enough information to answer the question! Does the man look poor or oppressed? Have I ever done anything to him that would inspire him to attack? Could we run away? What does my wife think? What about the kids? Could I possibly swing the gun like a club and knock the knife out of his hand? What does the law say about this situation? Does the Glock have an appropriate safety built into it? Why am I carrying a loaded gun and what kind of message does this send to society and my children? Is it possible he\'d be happy with just killing me? Does he definitely want to kill me or would he just be content to wound me? If I were to grab his knees and hold on, could my family get away while he was stabbing me? This is all so confusing! I need to debate this with some friends for a few days to try to come to a conclusion.

Conservative Answer:


Texan's Answer:

click... (sounds of reloading).

Wife: \"Sweetheart, he looks like he\'s still moving, what do you kids think?\"

Son: \"Mom\'s right Dad, I saw it too...\"


Daughter: \"Nice group, Daddy! Were those the Winchester Silver Tips

      cuzzin ricky


I-RIGHT-I said...

We tell that one down here every week over coffee and doughnuts before Sunday school.

SFAOV Sgsaur said...

Same in Mississippi, although my preferance is for Federal Personal Protection rounds - nasty hollowpoints with a penetrator rod core. Keep your mind out of the gutter, my liege...

K-nine said...

I recently heard that the military was no longer allowed to use the term "double tap" because it sounded too violent.
The new terminology is "controlled grouping"

Anonymous said...

Wife: You are NOT having that mounted!

Helly said...

You lost me at the expert shot being liberal.

Anonymous said...

Killed a badly infected hog. So used it for a test dummy. Federal Expanding Full Metal Jacket, holy smokes is all I can say.

markshere2 said...

My Glock .40 has 15 in the mag and one in the tube, so there's not enuff bangs in that version for me.

Anonymous said...

I just love stories with happy endings. That one had two.

Anonymous said...

RE: Federal HydraShok rounds (Reflagged as Personal Protection) I too am a fan of the Federal loads, though I have not, and God willing WILL NEVER have to use them for their intended purpose, but as a point of fact, the "rod" in the center of the hollow point is not a penetrator. It was designed to deflect more energy to the wall of the cavity, thus ensuring (it was hoped) controlled expansion.

The round does seem to have a good track record in actual shootings, but like nearly all hollow nosed rounds, expansion occurs about 50%-60% of the time. The rest of the time the nose cavity gets plugged with clothing bits, bone, what have you. So in the end they perform at least as well as FMJ loads, with a decent chance of performing better.

Anonymous said...

Liberal Answer: Can I still out run my wife and kids?

DougM said...

Junior, run y'se'f over't the Jeep an' fetch me a ear tag 'afore the dang police or game warden show up. Don't argue, now. Git! Sissy, you go make sure as he don't dawdle. G'won, now. An' move the dogs so's there's room in the back. An' bring my field-dressin' knife. What? Either one. An' my beer!

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