Fun E-Mails

17 E-mails

“ 1 Marc Miller Dr. Laura and something about Jello 2 Jodi The Undiscovered Google: 7 Services You Need to Try 3. El Jefe I wasn't going to get an AARP membership, but now I will 4. cuzzin ricky Interesting site 5. El Jefe Teach a man to fish and he don't need no stinking gummint programs 6. Rick B Easily Understandable Explanation of Derivative Markets 7. El Jefe This west Texas farmer had a problem   &   this 8. cuzzin ricky Indian professor on the versatility of the F word 9. Keith in Kingwood USA UAS USA! 10. THor Air Traffic Patterns World Wide 11. Tom Mann Mental Acuity Test 12. Tom Mann A few years ago on a drive to Gettysburg, I decided to try and find Camp David, and while I could guess at the location, I wasn\'t really certain.  When I got home, I went to mapquest satellite photos thinking I could find it by spotting the blocked out area.  Was I ever surprised to not only spot it, but to find the view unobstructed.  I was just looking for something else on google earth and it turned out to be nearby.  I'm absolutely amazed at the level of detail that they permit. 13 El Jefe These pics were taken from an airplane and you have to guess where the location is. You correctly answered 16 out of 16. You score is 100% 14 mary Oh, my! I am SO old! And glad of it.  I thought I'd heard it all with the bleaching bit, but no, there was more. I Got Vajazzled (and had a camera crew) 15 Tim W This is a letter accidently sent home with 2nd grade students in Litchfield Park Az. The princpal was venting. Now some parents are fuming. I'm laughing!       Tim 16 Rick B  Here's a solution to  all the controversy over full-body scanners. Have a booth that you can step into that will not X-ray you, but will detonate any explosive device you may have on you.    It would be a  win-win for everyone, and there would be none of this crap about racial profiling!   17 Rick B Subject: Tactical grip http://dontevenreply.com/view.php?post=84 ”

Robert Byrd and Reconciliation

Byrd touches himself,

Watch why he stopped Clinton's Healthcare reconciliation attempt. So, will the senate's Grand Kleegle stop Obamacare reconciliation?   Why no, because this time the deficit is being reduced.  “ I believed then, as now, that the Senate should debate the health reform bill under regular rules, which it did. The result of that debate was the passing of a comprehensive health care reform bill in the Senate by a 60-vote supermajority. I continue to support the budget reconciliation process for deficit reduction. The entire Senate- or House- passed health care bill could not and would not pass muster under the current reconciliation rules, which were established under my watch. Yet a bill structured to reduce deficits by, for example, finding savings in Medicare or lowering health care costs, may be consistent with the Budget Act, and appropriately considered under reconciliation. With all due respect, the Daily Mail’s hyperbole about “imposing government control,” acts of “disrespect to the American people” and “corruption” of Senate procedures resembles more the barkings from the nether regions of Glennbeckistan than the “sober and second thought” of one of West Virginia’s oldest and most respected daily newspapers. [Full] ”

The toonament

ACC Tournament Preview

Reporter loses it

"Hissy Fit"

If a reporter is going to allow personal feelings to show, better this than the rolled eyes, smirks, and looks of disgust whenever, say, a "Sarah Palin" is mentioned. At least Gordon Boyd's emotions are the result of him having a moral compass.

The Biology Test & Monica Conyers

Today's Flunk ?

I thought for sure I was right I flunked my Biology exam last Friday. I was asked to name something commonly found in cells. Apparently "African Americans" is not the correct answer. Tim I am so sorry, but I do love a good joke, and ethnic jokes are some of the best (as my Polish wife, and my ½ Polish kids can attest).  Now, add that I received this e-mail just moments after reading this., and  ...... well, how could I not?   I'll do community service this afternoon.

Pass the salt?

Rejectio ad absurdum

Government controlled heath care has always been comprised of two disagreeable components. "More expensive and vastly more inefficient," describes the first.  It's here that the battle against, what has become the Administration's  bricolage of crap, bribes, and falsehoods has been focused.   But skulking in the wings is the second, more sinister consequence.  Government control of every aspect of our lives. It's difficult to introduce this argument, because it smacks of politics, and will thus cause those schooled in the joy of gummint to lash out, like sharks, at anything that moves.  So, how fortuitous that, at this crucial juncture, the enemy have once again overreached.  Absurdly so. A bill introduced in the New York Legislature would ban the use of salt in restaurant cooking. In just 17 words, Liberals have painted a mind bubble  that every man, woman, and child in the country will see, and comprehend.  Pass the popcorn, but without salt. :)

Dr. Matson's surprise

In Passing

In passing ..

Almost 10 things that will let you dominate the coffee break conversation

JFC! “ 1) Eight Things the Global Warmists Could Do to Convince Me They Want to Save the Earth 2. Al Gore and the others would give up their quarter-million dollar speaking fees they command for warning people about an imminent catastrophe, and stop railing against greedy corporations while setting themselves up to make billions in carbon trading schemes. 2) Thought Experiment: If Health Care Is a Right If you live in the village of Curmudgeon, Montana, where there are no doctors, will the government compel a doctor to move to the area? If you've received multiple heart bypass ... . 3) ARTICLE 42 OF THE SOVIET CONSTITUTION - Article 42. Citizens of the USSR have the right to health protection. Hey, does anyone know how that worked out?  4) Goose & Gander: Clips of Jon Stewart shows Viacom/Comedy Central retreats from some legal rumblings on behalf of a show itself known for its clever use of video clips from other sources. -- related posts - Yoko Ono vs. Ben Stein Why there aren’t DVDs of some of your favorite old TV series Whatever happened to the Nitpicker’s Guides? Violence toward Barney, cont’d Vince Offer – a ShamWow-tastic litigator 5)  What's Arabic for "you're no Atticus Finch?" Every white shoe law firm in the country has been clamoring to take the cases of Guantanamo detainees, while young associates line up to be put on the case. This is even more fun than defending Ted Bundy! 6) Paris is MELTING! "Is that a polar bear on your ass or are you just glad to see me?" 7) Sex and the City 2: The Makeup Artist Of Death? Some new stills of the upcoming Sex and the City 2 movie have surfaced, and I gotta wonder whether the makeup artist really didn’t like Sarah Jessica Parker all that much because she’s resembling a cadaver 8) Physician Survey: Health Reform May Lead to Significant Reduction in Physician Workforce ....   predicts a more than a 22 percent increase in physician jobs during the ten-year period ending in 2018. This places physician careers in the top 20 fastest-growing occupations from 2008 to 2018. Meanwhile, nearly one-third of physicians responding to the survey indicated that they will want to leave medical practice after health reform is implemented. 9) A living diary of the Obama experience Because everyone will someday want to rekindle the joy. ”

Rahm's Game Face

Eric Holder - Again

Holder Reportedly Failed to Disclose Gitmo Detainee Brief "even though the Senate questionnaire he was required to fill out specifically requested such information" $5 says "slipped my mind" will be found in the first paragraph of Holder's explanation.

More gummint evil

CENSLUS Gobbledy-Gook 2010

“ I wonder if we’re going to get a letter with the actual form informing us that the form is here......... (Sondrak) ”

Aside from the obvious-to-everybody-with-a-working-brain-stem  inefficaciousness of this notice of a notice, I'm offended by the gobbledygook below (pun not intended).  I don't need to explain why, or how.  Most everyone will have the same thoughts.  Have you seen this? “ Sending a Message with the Census   [Mark Krikorian] John: I haven't gotten my letter from the Census Bureau yet asking me to make sure I fill out the questionnaire. But when I do fill it out, I'll use it to send a message. Fully one-quarter of the space on this year's form is taken up with questions of race and ethnicity, which are clearly illegitimate and none of the government's business (despite the New York Times' assurances to the contrary on today's editorial page). So until we succeed in building the needed wall of separation between race and state, I have a proposal. Question 9 on the census form asks "What is Person 1's race?" (and so on, for other members of the household). My initial impulse was simply to misidentify my race so as to throw a monkey wrench into the statistics; I had fun doing this on the personal-information form my college required every semester, where I was a Puerto Rican Muslim one semester, and a Samoan Buddhist the next. But lying in this constitutionally mandated process is wrong. Really — don't do it. Instead, we should answer Question 9 by checking the last option — "Some other race" — and writing in "American." It's a truthful answer but at the same time is a way for ordinary citizens to express their rejection of unconstitutional racial classification schemes. In fact, "American" was the plurality ancestry selection for respondents to the 2000 census in four states and several hundred counties. So remember: Question 9 — "Some other race" — "American". Pass it on. ” Consider it passed on.

Michael Palin's adventures

Today's E-Mail

“ Hi Rodge: My friend Anne and I were having tea this morning, and we just don't get the whole India-Pakistan thing.  I know of course about your undercover service in both countries; could you perhaps provide us with a key? Best, Tim R. ” Hi Tim.  Perhaps I can.  See if this video of them going toe-to-toe helps.

I know there's a joke here ...

So, a Rabbi, a Priest, and a Mullah walk into this bar ... WTF?

Hoffman-Hoffman!

Remember Doug Hoffman ...

... who fell 4,000 votes short of an upset victory in the three-way special election won by Bill Owens, who became the first Democrat to represent the district in decades?  It's game on again, and this time Hoffman's favored to win.

A present suplise

China's military bluster camouflages toothless bite

Big on spit and polish and parades but short on experience, new technology and force coordination, China's military has far to go before its bite begins to approach its increasingly loud, and for some fearsome, bark.

I instinctively see some truth in this assessment, given our historical penchant for giving commies more credit than they deserve.  But, no nation with ICBMs, nuke warheads, and satellite technology is toothless.  Anyway, China's status as our nation's  mortgage holder (how in the *%#%@!!  did that happen?) is the real threat at the moment. Especially considering who represents our interests today.   This series of fortune cookie inserts are funny, and prophetic at once.

Parody of the month

Barry Seinfeld

“ The endless banter, the self-absorbed complaining – it sounds like Seinfeld, but with our liberal leaders, it’s just another day of the politics of meaninglessness.  ”

Mad props to Pajama's Media for this Barry Seinfeld performance, it is the shit! A good job too.

Real Art

What's unusual about this photo?

It's not a photo.  It's from this collection of  Hyperreal Paintings.  Wow. And me moi?  I too am a recognized artiste,but practice within the abstractness discipline.   Surprised?  Yup, I studied for 7 minutes that seemed like years at the Academie du Picasso.

Mr. Dondelinger?

In Passing

In passing ..

Almost 10 things

Mmmmm, Spam 1. The Dems' Deafening Silence On Tax Cuts Liberal leaders want us to believe Bush's tax cuts weakened the economy and created a climate of avarice. This fostered the speculative bubble that eventually burst, bringing down the financial sector and triggering the latest recession. - But just the opposite is true - 2. China warns US against selling F-16s to Taiwan Solution: Sell Taiwan F-22s, then lease them back 3. This Pop-up ad just popped , demonstrating: 1. The effectiveness of Firefox's pop-up stopper 2. Democrat's grasp of the concept of "insurance," or the free market system 4. Military Wisdom Sample: "Any ship can be a minesweeper. Once." — Maritime Ops Manual 5  Chief justice unsettled by Obama's criticism of Supreme Court "To the extent the State of the Union has degenerated into a political pep rally, I'm not sure why we are there" 6. Tigerhawk:A fantasy of my youth I'm fairly sure you are going to think less of me for this, but in my circle of friends, circa 1977, this would have made me the coolest dude alive. 7. Another innovation from the Netherlands: Assisted suicide for anyone over 70 who has simply had enough of life is being considered in Holland. Non-doctors would be trained to administer a lethal potion to elderly people who 'consider their lives complete'... [Mark Steyn] 7. Senator Graham Gets the Law Wrong . . . Again You can tell that the lawyers who've come to the aid of DOJ's al-Qaeda lawyers don't have a coherent case. Every time they open their mouths, they embarrass themselves. 8. Senators say energy clock ticking President Obama believes it is “critical” to have a price on carbon to grow the economy and create millions of jobs, Sen. John Kerry told reporters after their meeting Tuesday night. ...  Sen. Lindsey Lohan Graham emphasized job creation and pricing carbon in a business-friendly way. A comprehensive strategy is the only solution, he told reporters.  9. O'Krugman's Keynesian Blarney The columnist who worries about Washington not spending enough also blames the financial crisis on "free-market fundamentalism" and "letting bankers do what they want." When did Uncle Sam do that?

What's that word? Bitch. Yes, bitch.

“But we have to pass the bill so that you can find out what is in it ... '

Nancy Whatsherface

Speaker Nancy delivered a speech this morning at the 2010 Legislative Conference for the National Association of Counties (NACo).  I blindly plucked a handful of some of  that speech (below).  It is the most audacious rhetoric I've heard since -- since  Bill Clinton told a Texas crowd that the congress forced the 1993 tax hike on him. Pelosi is a sick puppy. “ "Tomorrow, Congressman George Miller will introduce his local jobs bill, which allows for county governments and municipalities to retain workers. “Nobody knows better than you the strain on hospitals that never turned a patient away, and health care providers grappling with the challenges of the uninsured and shrinking reimbursement. You know as well as anyone, that our current system is unsustainable. “President Obama said, one year ago, when he called the first bipartisan, on March 5th of last year, the first bipartisan House and Senate meeting together with many outside stakeholders together at the White House, to find a way for us to come together. And at that time, he said: ‘Health care reform is entitlement reform.’  We cannot sustain the upward spiral of the increases in health care Imagine an economy where people could follow their aspirations, where they could be entrepreneurial, where they could take risks professionally because personally their families health care needs are being met.  “You’ve heard about the controversies within the bill, the process about the bill, one or the other.  But I don’t know if you have heard that it is legislation for the future, not just about health care for America, but about a healthier America, where preventive care is not something that you have to pay a deductible for or out of pocket.  Prevention, prevention, prevention—it’s about diet, not diabetes. It’s going to be very, very exciting.  “But we have to pass the bill so that you can find out what is in it, away from the fog of the controversy.  Full ”