American Idol

Sing Melancholy Baby

I have never watched more than two running minutes of American Idol, until this week. What changed is my continuing disinterest in television.  WTF?  Let me explain.  From 6:00-8:00 my television is tuned to Channel 5 (FOX), where the programming runs 1)Seinfeld, 2) The Simpsons, 3) The Simpsons, 4) Seinfeld.  In the past  I changed channels at 8:00 to the Hitler Channel, and surfed from there.  Now, I'm generally unaware of programming changes (the disinterest), and stay focused on staring at the ceiling (the Bourbon), so when  Idol follows that last Seinfeld re-run, I let it go.  Holy Crap! Most wannabe idols are truly B-A-D singers, but seem genuinely conviced otherwise.  I'm a bit taken back by the lack of civility this guy whats-his-name shows (''you make me want to vomit'') while dismissing them.  But, I'm even more surprised over the reaction many of them display ("You are totally wrong, I am great singer, so go to Hell!").  I mentioned this to Mother Superior, who was in the TIVO room watching garden shows, and she pegged it.  "That's because nobody wants to hurt anybody's feelings anymore, starting in kindergarten, so nobody is aware of their shortcomings." She's right.  In America, everybody wins at Musical Chairs, until they start playing Life.  Oh, the heartache.  Oh, the humanity. Sort of explains John Kerry.