Friday, September 16, 2016

Pick Six

What did one lawyer say to the other Lawyer?
"We're both lawyers/"

Where did Napoleon keep his armies?
In his sleevies

A magic tractor drives down the road and turns into a field.

What's red and bad for your teeth?
A brick.

Whoever invented knock-knock jokes should get a no bell prize

What's brown and sticky?
A stick


jlw said...

what's purple and conquered the world?
Alexander the Grape

Anonymous said...

Why can't you trust an atom?
Because they make up everything.

A drunk walks into a bar with jumper cables around his neck. The bartender says, "You can stay but don't try to start anything."

"Give it to me! Give it to me!" she yelled, "I'm so wet, give it to me now!" She could scream all she wanted to. I was keeping the umbrella.


Anonymous said...

"Knock Knock?"
"Come in"


Most Deplorable Helly said...

I like electron jokes, but they get negative reactions.

Anonymous said...

I got kicked out of an ISIS training camp. Apparently, when they asked me "Who are you going to target?", "Rapists, pedophiles and psychopaths" wasn't the right answer.

Moo-lin-yan Nabo-li-don

Anonymous said...

I'm planning to win the Halloween costume contest by dressing as a Muslim with a backpack.

It just doesn't get any fucking scarier than that, does it?

Q. How long can you look at Muslims with one eye closed?
A. Until your magazine is empty.

Anonymous said...

My dick was in the Guinness Book of World Records.
Until the librarian had me thrown out.

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