Today's Norm MacDonald

Norm Macdonald on Identity Politics and God

Cinema Pick o'the day

You Have 2 Days Left to Watch Scapegoat (on Netflix) {Linda Sue)

Hook Tube

Comments?

Ahem ...

Do you think Mark  Levin gets a little passionate about things?😅 maybe that’s why I like him. He’s a lot like someone I love. https://youtu.be/vRavAq3497I MoSup

Lexophilia

Lexophiles "Lexophile" describes those who have a love for words, such as "You can tune a piano, but you can't tuna fish", or "To write with a broken pencil is pointless." An annual competition is held by the New York Times to see who can create the best original lexophile. This year's winning submission is posted below No matter how much you push the envelope, it'll still be stationery. If you don't pay your exorcist you can get repossessed. I'm reading a book about anti-gravity. I just can't put it down. I didn't like my beard at first. Then it grew on me. Did you hear about the crossed-eyed teacher who lost her job because she couldn't control her pupils? When you get a bladder infection, urine trouble. When chemists die, they barium. I stayed up all night to see where the sun went, and then it dawned on me. I changed my iPod's name to Titanic. It's syncing now. England has no kidney bank, but it does have a Liverpool . Haunted French pancakes give me the crepes. This girl today said she recognized me from the Vegetarians Club, but I'd swear I've never met herbivore I know a guy who's addicted to drinking brake fluid, but he says he can stop any time. A thief who stole a calendar got twelve months. When the smog lifts in Los Angeles U.C.L.A. I got some batteries that were given out free of charge. A dentist and a manicurist married. They fought tooth and nail. A will is a dead giveaway. With her marriage, she got a new name and a dress. Police were summoned to a daycare center where a three-year-old was resisting a rest. Did you hear about the fellow whose entire left side was cut off? He's all right now. A bicycle can't stand alone; it's just two tired. cuzzin Ricky

What is Diversity? (Clap Calp Clap)

In a nutshell MoSup

Prove it!

When Soros and Podesta Pick a Pope Which One is Satire? VATICAN CITY—In an effort to make the holiday as stress-free as possible for everyone, Pope Francis asked congregants gathered at St. Peter’s Basilica Thursday if it would be okay to just do a low-key Easter this year. “I know we usually get dressed up and make a big deal out of Easter, but wouldn’t it be nice if just this once we had one laid-back mass on Sunday and then called it a day?” said the Supreme Pontiff, noting that while he loved the tradition, he was completely swamped for most of Lent and did not have much time to prepare for the Christian festival this year. “We can definitely do a little communion Easter morning, and maybe we’ll have a quick homily, but, honestly, can we all just save ourselves the hassle and skip Good Friday?” At press time, the Pope was stressing that Easter was really about spending time with loved ones while wondering aloud if it might be better for everyone to just grab brunch at a bistro in Rome’s Flaminio district. * *Pope Benedict XVI said in a 2007 sermon, “Jesus came to tell us that he wants us all in Heaven and that Hell, of which so little is said in our time, exists and is eternal for those who close their hearts to his love.” Soros and Podesta say it all/ PREVIOULSY

Today's Norm Macdonald

If not Trump?

Catharsis

If Not Trump... Who? To those who didn't get the original notification, this is just a note that I won't be sending out news articles each day.  Here is why. (Skoonj) Trump just kissed his own ass goodbye. The Republicans will lose the House, Trump will be impeached, and he will not be re-elected in 2020. That's my instant analysis. In fact, he might not last that long. His effort to not get blamed for a government shutdown has sealed his fate. He got horrible advice from his staff. Reagan shut it down several times, and pretty much got what he wanted despite not having majorities in either House. Once impeached, which is a near certainty, how many of senate castrati will join Democrats in voting to convict? This debacle tells me it no longer matters who I vote for. Democrat and Republican, it's all the same. It doesn't even matter which party is in the majority. The Senate majority leader, McConnell, has been invisible since the signing. Maybe he's consulting with the Chinese paymasters for his wife and himself. Last year, early in the new administration, Rush Limbaugh interviewed Vice President Pence on his radio show. Rush asked ... why would anyone vote for Republicans? I don't recall the answer. A year later it really doesn't matter which candidate and which party one votes for. Election day will come and go without notice in my house. Maybe I'll get up the energy to go to the polling place and make a demonstration: I'll burn my voter registration card. That's how little voting means today. No, I don't feel any better about it now.  In fact, voting and political activism or even rooting means essentially nothing.  Each day I send out between ten and 20 articles, mostly political.  With them, it is my hope, people are better informed and that may help when confronting the "lesser breeds without the law."  However, what Trump has done is so egregious, and comes from a Congress so compromised, that information, confrontation and voting mean essentially nothing.  We came.  We fought.  We lost. I now see no reason to continue sending out the articles, and so I won't.  I'm not going anywhere, but I'm not going to waste my time. Damian Housman I'm a Democrat I Loot the Treasury Thank You For Your Support In my Dear Don post last week I expressed my own disappointment with The Donald.   My assessment of the state of our union goes much deeper than the presidency. Here are some thoughts that cross my mind.  Hey, I'm not saying I would follow through, they're just random thoughts that express my despair. We are engaged in a great civil war.  For Real  Who do we have to kill? And how?  Were' talking millions.  Eek. After selling our home and cashing out, where do we move? If they come for my guns (if I only had some) would I shoot it out? Yes if I saw them coming  (my wife did not disagree when I shared this one with her) What can I, as one person do? Maybe like John Burns. I pray. Would I nuke Washington DC if I could? At the right (or wrong) moment (Congress in session for sure).  And all Democrat Party functions. Would these actions be a mortal sin?  Do I blame Donald Trump? ( No) I think we move to Alabama. If I cashed out everything I could buy a helicopter and ... do stuff. Todays Millennials and snowflakes are the future, But they are so utterly ignorant.  Nuking about 300 college campi would be a noble thing, Fuck Duke. .(writ on Monday, posted on Friday)

Was ist los?

Klicken Sie auf das Bild

Paul, Apostle of Christ

‘Paul, Apostle of Christ’: Critics Hate It, the People Love It Those critics who bothered, or who were given an opportunity to review the latest faith-based movie Paul, Apostle of Christ,dumped all over it at a 75 percent rate; the audience score, however, is a healthy 93 percent approval, according to Rotten Tomatoes. This of course will send the professional atheist lobby into a furious  paroxysm.   On the plus side, it may also lead a forlorn soul to consider the immutable values of Christianity. tip=Skoonj

Hmmmm

Blogger has somehow blocked my last post, and after rebooting even the original workup on my computer "save files"  has disappeared . I'm just saying.

Dear Don ...

Dear Donald:

Two Things in Particular 1. How Does Planned Parenthood Get $500 Million Taxpayer Money a Year? 2. Where is the promised indictment of Hillary Clinton? Federal agents used a confidential U.S. witness working inside the Russian nuclear industry to gather extensive financial records, make secret recordings and intercept emails as early as 2009 that showed Moscow had compromised an American uranium trucking firm with bribes and Spokesmen for Holder and Clinton did not return calls seeking comment. The Justice Department also didn’t comment. kickbacks in violation of the Foreign Corrupt Practices Act, FBI and court documents show. They also obtained an eyewitness account — backed by documents — indicating Russian nuclear officials had routed millions of dollars to the U.S. designed to benefit former President Bill Clinton’s charitable foundation during the time Secretary of State Hillary Clinton served on a government body that provided a favorable decision to Moscow, sources told The Hill. I could go on .... . Trump Signs Bloated $1.3 Trillion Omnibus Bill... ..Says He Had No Choice... Says He Won't Do It Again... .Chuck Gets His Tunnel: ‘We’re Able to Accomplish More in the Minority’.. ...CNN: Trump Got Rolled — by *Republicans* Coulter to Trump: 'You'll Be Impeached' After Dems Take Back Congress

First thing on your mind, too?

Techno Thrills

Walmart's: shelf-scanning robots to patrol the aisles Machines already play a part in the shopping experience for many, with self-checkout facilities popping up in supermarkets and department stores all over the world. They now continue their push into retail, with Walmart expanding its trials of robots that roam the aisles for sections in need of attention. Self-checkouts have been around for years now, but the truth is there a other repetitive tasks that could conceivably be carried out by machines. Way back in 2015, Simbe Robotics took aim at at this with a fully autonomous robot called Tally that rolls around stores using a sensor array to make sure shelves are fully stocked and that items are correctly priced, placed and labelled. [FULL]

Norm Macdonald Does the News ...

Brilliantly

Ice Capades

Sorry .. The laughing made me laugh

JUICES DID IT

Obama Calling ...

Ahem  CuzRicky

Daily Stuff Meant For Yesterday

So, guess what?

Begets ...  Why Is YouTube Censoring 21 Educational Videos From PragerU?

One of 234,673 known ...

Face Book ... Again

A Fine Tale

TEXT

At your own risk

Much has been written about Melania Trump's topless photos, but it's run of the mill by European standards

Living the dream

MORE (Babylon Bee)

Playing it Cool and Mortified

cinema à la carte

Playing it Cool Brilliant (IMHO) There are parts of this (1. The Mortified Guide to Love and Sex Vol.1) that nearly sent me into Laughter-Induced Syncope

Ricky Gervais on NetFlix

CLAP CLAP CLAP If Louie CK's "Of course ... but maybe.." routine offended you, so might this.   But, then,  there's this reason to watch.

Testing Warren's Squawness

Radio Host Will Sneak Warren's DNA  and Test Her Squawness Which again begs the question ... why hasn't somebody grabbed some Brock Obama DNA sample and test it against any number of possible  daddys, including Barack Obama Sr.?

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Genesis- Democrats & OPM

Deep Deep States

I have in the past been a Catholic with, erm, Pope Francis issues Appears I had good instincts.  This is not just a Catholic church issue. Fatima and the New World Order  (Couldn't sleep after watching late Sat night) An Unholy Alliance: the UN, Soros, and the Francis Papacy - Elizabeth Yore - Chicago 2017 - OLA IL (Couldn't sleep after watching last night) More World Over - 2018-02-22 - Cardinal Gerhard Muller with Raymond Arroyo Pope Francis Praises Soros-Funded Organization; Encourages “Resistance” Reading between the lines Italian Archbishop Suggests Pope Benedict XVI Resigned Under Obama ‘Pressure’ It is “no coincidence” that some Catholic groups “have asked President Trump to open a commission of inquiry to investigate whether the administration of Barack Obama exerted pressure on Benedict,” said Archbishop Luigi Negri in an interview Monday, citing other revelations by Wikileaks regarding efforts by the Democratic Party to sway the direction of the Catholic Church in the United States.

DADS

McCabe Pays For His Sins!

BIG BANGING

What I See

College Dropout on the Radio Tries to Figure Out the Big Bang Theory SCROLL RUSH: Now, Stephen Hawking has passed away, age 76, the longest surviving human in history with ALS. He had a variation of this disease that was not as deadly as the primary form of the disease is. Living to 76 with ALS is a big deal, and he’s been acknowledged as the smartest, the most intelligent, the brightest, years and years — light years — ahead of everybody in terms of knowledge of the universe and quantum physics and laser physics, astrophysics, all of physics’ fields. He’s just light years ahead of everybody, acknowledged to be smarter than anybody in the world. Yet this guy said that we’ve got 200 years… Where have we heard this before? “We have 200 years! If we don’t figure out how to colonize someplace else, we’ve got 200 years and we’re toast.” Now, would somebody explain to me where else that we can go? Is there a planet that supports life right now? Would somebody explain this to me? Where is it? What are we gonna colonize? I’m not trying to be disrespectful to Professor Hawking. Folks, I’m just a college dropout radio guy. I just have common sense, everyday questions. A guy says to me, “We’re toast in 200 years unless we figure out how to colonize X.” What? The moon? Mars? We’re gonna have to create global warming someplace, wherever we go, to be able to live there. You ever stop to think about that? I mean, and everybody swoons and thinks, “Wow, man! He’s so far ahead of all of us.” And I don’t doubt that, in his field, there’s no question he was light years ahead of everybody and there’s no way to prove it. We just all accepted it. But this colonizing someplace else? It’s not just him. Elon Musk is on this. You know, all of these Silicon Valley brain wizards say, “The earth is gonna destroy us! Global warming, climate change are gonna destroy us. We’re gonna run out of this, run out of that.” We’re not running out of anything. Natural resources are increasing. Life expectancy is increasing. Life on earth has never been better than it is today in any statistical way that you want to measure it, and yet the doom-and-gloom crowd says, “Two hundred years! Two hundred…” That means the people who are gonna eventually colonize have not been born yet. (interruption) Just did what? (interruption) I know he just… (interruption) This is not the first time I have raised questions… (interruption) Okay. Wait a minute, now. Snerdley and the staff are saying, “I can’t believe you did this. The guy just passed away!” Okay. What am I supposed to do? “Folks, I wish to join Professor Hawking in encouraging you and every one of us to begin immediately working on transferring our entire population to somewhere else. We’ve got 200 years to figure it out, and I today come before you to endorse…” Is that what I was supposed to do because he passed away? (interruption) I don’t want you to hit the delay button. This is not a sign of disrespect. Is it sounding like a sign of disrespect? You know… (interruption) Of course I know I’m the only one in the world… (interruption) It’s not just on the day of Stephen Hawking passing away. I mean, Elon Musk mentions this, you know, twice a month, and whenever I hear about it, I say the same thing: “Where are we gonna go, and how are we gonna get one billion people there? [...] I have all kinds of… You know, the Big Bang. Let’s look at the Big Bang. People accept that the Big Bang is how all of this began. Now, again, folks, I have a belief. One of the ways I have proven to myself… ‘Cause I think we’ve all tried to do this. We accept the faith, but then we still test it. As long as there are questions that we can ask… Meaning, we have been created with the intelligence to create or ask these questions, this quest for knowledge. If there are questions we can ask to which we will never have the answers, then that gives me confidence that there is more than just life on earth. What is the point of creating beings who can ponder such places if they don’t exist? Certainly the Big Bang. Again, I’ll admit I’m just a college dropout radio guy, okay? I’m not a professional physicist. I’m not a professional scientist. I do not own a lab coat, white or light blue. So they tell me that the Big Bang is where everything began. Hawking says it’s the Big Bang and we’re still expanding. [Full Brillancy] Heads up via Skoonj Fr. Robert J. Spitzer, S.J., Ph.D. dissects Stephen Hawking's statement that you don't need a "first cause" to explain the creation of the universe. Are faith and science in conflict? Actually there has never been a better time to unite the two. Contemporary science is giving us the tools to test our reasons to believe, and is leading us to some surprising conclusions. To Wit ... Science, Reason & Faith