So this monkey ...

"What is wrong with you?" one scientist asked. "You have just been buried alive in pig shit and you are LAUGHING!?" The Third Scientist replied, between his laughter, "You should have seen the monkey trying to put the cork back in!" After weeks of malaise, turned into ennui, and a shit-storm of hardware failures, I'm trying to get back to bidness.  But (cue pighshit joke) I find myself utterly deluged with stuff I squirreled away.  I'm brain farted to death, but determined to march on.  Just as soon as I take this little nap.

Addled-up here boss

A CAUTIONARY TALE Well this is a sumbitch.  After reinstalling Win 8 (in a pique I deleted  it a month ago-without a reliable backup because that's how pissed off I was). I used to do that all the time, and it was a piece of cake. No more.  Just a month ago I finished the June Mahjong Challenge (3 puzzles a day) with 100% for the third month in a row, although I did have a real problem with one, and took me at least a dozen tries. I really knew something was amiss when I started the June challenge beginning Jube 17th. Right off the bat I had problems with even some "Easy" ones.  July ended with three unfinished ga,es. Now, this is all about memory. You have to remember what tiles you missed, amd where they were. I can't do that in any depth now.  WTFF?  Mosup says it's sugar. Starting the New Year, I had a case of flu that lasted the better part of a month.  My daily 10,000 Fitbit steps a day plummeted to 6000.  Then I had what I thought was a torn knee cartilege.  No.  I have arthritiis in both knees.  Sawbones wants to do kneecaps;  No way, not while I can still walk and two Aleve's twice a day keeps them servicable, but  my steps went down to under 5000.  The poison ivy that turned into contact dermatitis was the killer. I spend the better part of the day watching movies and snacking.   I'm putting on weight which puts me in danger—warms MoSup—of getting Type 2 -- what the hell, I can't think of it (this is in real time)  ...  !Type 2 Diabetes, or worse.  My brain isn't snapping right. Diabetes is the worse disease you can have because it attacks every part of your body. That prospect scared the hell out of me enopught that I got my harmonica and began building my lung capacity back up(3 pack a day smoker before I quit 12 years ago).  Harmonica playing is only thing that works.  I'm learning Dixie.  It's already paying dividends—rode my bike yesterday. Today I turned another corner.  After watching Mountain Men for 6 straight hours I was really pumped! Turned  the AC  up to 75° (from 72°), the better to swaet. Went out to the garage, found my axe, and sharpened it!  Hoo-Rah!   I shot a mouse in the garage too.  I'm back!  Now, where that Eskimo woman I'm supposed to fuck?  Wait ... is that right? CRAP

Dear Fix-a-Flat ...

I'm so flatted ... Unplugged So, I have a CT Scan to get too and, whoa!  A very slow tire leak hath possessed my left rear tire.  But no worry, I had fortuitously just purchased a can of fix a flat (Tire sensor safe!).   Screwed the nipple on (mmmmmm, nipple) and pressed the trigger.  KABLOWWY!  The thing blew up in my face.  Opening my right eye just enough to navigate, I made it into the kitchen and sprayed my face. I wasn't blind, so there's that.  Back outside I turned on the compressor and pumped the tire up to 32 lbs, and took off.   It was a slow leak after all.  On the off ramp to the hospital I feel the wheels go squishy, and—yup—the sound of flat tire.  With a line of cars behind me, and the parking garage just a football field away, I went for it.  KA-SLAPPETA KA-SLAPPETA KA-SLAPPETA.  I parked right in front of the elevator in a do not park space, and made it with a minute to spare.  Shredded. Did I say I don't have a cell phone?  Don't want one. I did have my I pad, so I took a pic of my location and posted it on MoSup's Facebook page (I don't do Facebook myself). A minute later I looked to see if it posted, and my daughter had already commented "Jimi (my S-I-L) on the way!"  To finish in as few words as possible... When I got to the car Jimi had replaced the tire with the donut tire.  But it was flat.  We drove to a tire store with the rim and bought a new tire for $122.00.  Went back in time to face the beach traffic.  Got home.  Did I say MoSup had warned me to get the leak fixed?  She did not say a word.  She is a saint. PS- If the fix a flat  people see this, I was blinded by their product and the operation will cost $5 million.  PPS - Within 5 minutes of that FB post I received (on my iPad) a copy of his AAA card from one son, and a "what can I do" note from another.  It's good to be a father. PPPS - God Bless You Jimi HAHA CRAP

The Big Itch Is A Bitch

Been itching to see you Previously As an aside, I've had a poison ivy rash that will match or surpass anything you'll see in this gallery.   My Doc put me on 2 weeks of  steroids a few days ago. (May 28) It morphed into contact dermatitis, which sounds a lot more benign than it feels. Sumbitch moved to my first dance partner (left palm) on Friday.  By yesterday was so swollen I could not close my fist.  Hurt like a sob. Right arm throbbed enough that I had to take some Percocet.  MoSup drove me to the ER.  They had to cut my wedding ring off —to which I quipped, to nobody's apparent amusement, "I can go the singes bar again!."  Last night I slept for 6 hours (my Fit Bit logs sleep/restlessness).  That's the most night sleep I've had in a month.  Been averaging 2-3 hours. Took a three hour nap already too.  Moral:  None that I can think of, off-hand; sht happens.  Thanks for the well wishing.

Unavailable

I'm stsly being held captive

Sent

 From ipad

New Beginnings

TRANSITIONS Unplugged Lately, people at the liquor store have been saying (churlishly),  "Say Rodge!  Are you doing a Blog or what?"  I say yes, why?  They say, "because you'd never know it. " I say, that's because I noticed that the really good condimentrists, like Ann Coulter, only do one column a week; but that column is always special.  The topics are timely, the satire delicious, and facts are aways at least 99% factual; and I agree with everything because it makes sense!"  So they say, "Okay, so where's your weekly column?" Good point.  Here it  is. Lately I've had a good deal of problem dealing with these people.  The people who are in the news.  All of them.  All the Democrats and most of the Republicans are skunks and liars. They should all be shot.  And not just them.  If I was the leader I'd go into every prison and if an inmate had a gang tattoo I'd have them shot because gang tats are only "worn" by people who've killed someone; so they're guilty. And I'd shoot everyone in the media too, except for some.  I mean it. And from now on colleges will only be able to field teams which members are from their state.  The facts are there to support me. And what's this where we are plagued by endless special interest groups that subscribe to one cockamamie idea or another?  These people, who are freaks, and who in olden times were just ignored, or openly ridiculed or shot.   Now, if you criticize them, you're the bad guy.  Screw them .  The facts will support me in this. I didn't mention the guy in the White House  because it makes me ill to think about him being there.  He's a liar and a crook and I'd arrest him.  And I'd fire Mike Krusheschkee the Duke coach for being a liar and a cheat.  All girls would have to produce an intact hymen before they are  allowed to register to vote. No more screwing around; it's how out founding fathers wanted it. We need to get back to basics. The NRA will be in charge of gun laws since they at least know how to handle firearms; like our founding fathers. Muslims are allowed but only if they promise to convert to Christianity; all the rest will be deported. And drones are illegal.  Flat tax of 11%.  IRS abolished.  Okay. This is not satire.  I mean it.  More next week. Donate.

And There's More From Where That Came From!

ennui vs. overload

SOME TEXT

My meager posting of late has little to do with the ennui that once caused me to, every few years,  publicly announce that I quit blogging, only then to return.  Now I'm plagued with so many things I want to say that I don't know where to start, so instead I watch movies, go read stuff, or indulge in whatever else seems easy at the time.  Just thinking out loud here boss.  As one is wont to do while drinking ale at 10:00 in the morning.

.... and a great cook, great lover, great ....

People are always asking. "Say, Rodge .. .... being honest and direct, with an occasional touch of bad taste If you don't write your own epitaph, someone else will.  And it's likely to be some bastard who was jealous of your good looks, manliness and beautiful wife! At the end of Battered Bastards of Baseball Bing Russell recited his own epitaph. I remembered that I liked it, but had to go back last night to get the thing right. I would like that to be my epitaph as well.  Hey, "occasional" is nebulous enough for government work, right?

Making Do

You know how when MoSup goes off on her class reunion, and I immediately, despite my most determined other-wising, revert to bachelorhoodity?  And when she calls and says she's reached Tappahannock on her way home, and I spring into a frenzy of cleaning, washing and picking up?  Well, she hasn't called from Tappahannock yet, but she will soon, and, holy mother of God, I bent over to tie my boots this morning and snap!  I threw my back out in a major way.  Srsly, while I am sitting in my computer chair right now, even moving to engage the Caps Lock key sends a jolt through me.  Most people in this state would be screaming out an open window, "Help, I've fallen and can't get up," but I am a warrior and will not!.  Instead, I will spend this time setting the scene so that when she does get home, I will receive her approbation for suffering through instead of her  going into a sullen silence while she bangs loudly about in the kitchen, clanging dishes (and my good knives) and thrown into the dishwasher; and then storming into the den picking up strewn socks and underpants;  and without asking "can I run the vacuum cleaner?,"  fires up the old Hoover that sounds like a jet engine and, one which pitch causes me excruciating pain, which she knows is an audio form of water boarding for me.  You know how that is? But no.  When she arrives home, she will find me laying on the floor, with a six day growth of beard, a broom in my hand and dust pan not far away.  A scene not unlike the Marine who covered for his platoon and was later found with a .45  clutched in his hand, empty, with 8 Japanese troops, dead – three of them with bullet-holes in the middle of their forehead.  And I will have peach pie served to me, and a back rub. I am not making this up.

blind man reading here boss

Oh My It's the Seagate that won't mount

trkof@trkof-p7-1205 ~ $ LSUSB LSUSB: command not found trkof@trkof-p7-1205 ~ $ lsusb Bus 002 Device 005: ID 0bc2:3312 Seagate RSS LLC Bus 002 Device 004: ID 045e:00f9 Microsoft Corp. Wireless Desktop Receiver 3.1 Bus 002 Device 003: ID 05e3:0608 Genesys Logic, Inc. USB-2.0 4-Port HUB Bus 002 Device 002: ID 8087:0024 Intel Corp. Integrated Rate Matching Hub Bus 002 Device 001: ID 1d6b:0002 Linux Foundation 2.0 root hub Bus 001 Device 005: ID 058f:6362 Alcor Micro Corp. Flash Card Reader/Writer Bus 001 Device 004: ID 04f2:0841 Chicony Electronics Co., Ltd HP Multimedia Keyboard Bus 001 Device 007: ID 1058:0820 Western Digital Technologies, Inc. Bus 001 Device 006: ID 05e3:0608 Genesys Logic, Inc. USB-2.0 4-Port HUB Bus 001 Device 003: ID 05e3:0608 Genesys Logic, Inc. USB-2.0 4-Port HUB Bus 001 Device 002: ID 8087:0024 Intel Corp. Integrated Rate Matching Hub Bus 001 Device 001: ID 1d6b:0002 Linux Foundation 2.0 root hub trkof@trkof-p7-1205 ~ $ sudo fdisc -1 [sudo] password for trkof: sudo: fdisc: command not found trkof@trkof-p7-1205 ~ $ sudo fdisk -1 fdisk: invalid option -- '1' Usage:  fdisk [options]    change partition table  fdisk [options] -l list partition table(s)  fdisk -s      give partition size(s) in blocks Options:  -b             sector size (512, 1024, 2048 or 4096)  -c[=]           compatible mode: 'dos' or 'nondos' (default)  -h                    print this help text  -u[=]           display units: 'cylinders' or 'sectors' (default)  -v                    print program version  -C           specify the number of cylinders  -H           specify the number of heads  -S           specify the number of sectors per track trkof@trkof-p7-1205 ~ $ dmesg | tail [  957.985086] scsi 9:0:0:0: Direct-Access     Seagate  Expansion Desk   0319 PQ: 0 ANSI: 6 [  957.985418] sd 9:0:0:0: Attached scsi generic sg6 type 0 [  967.829631] sd 9:0:0:0: [sdf] 732566646 4096-byte logical blocks: (3.00 TB/2.72 TiB) [  967.830499] sd 9:0:0:0: [sdf] Write Protect is off [  967.830505] sd 9:0:0:0: [sdf] Mode Sense: 2b 00 10 08 [  967.831373] sd 9:0:0:0: [sdf] Write cache: enabled, read cache: enabled, supports DPO and FUA [  967.832331] sd 9:0:0:0: [sdf] 732566646 4096-byte logical blocks: (3.00 TB/2.72 TiB) [  967.856761]  sdf: sdf1 [  967.858107] sd 9:0:0:0: [sdf] 732566646 4096-byte logical blocks: (3.00 TB/2.72 TiB) [  967.887229] sd 9:0:0:0: [sdf] Attached SCSI disk trkof@trkof-p7-1205 ~ $ MORE Error mounting /dev/sdf1 at /media/trkof/Seagate Expansion Drive1: Command-line `mount -t "ntfs" -o "uhelper=udisks2,nodev,nosuid,uid=1000,gid=1000,dmask=0077,fmask=0177" "/dev/sdf1" "/media/trkof/Seagate Expansion Drive1"' exited with non-zero exit status 13: ntfs_attr_pread_i: ntfs_pread failed: Input/output error Failed to read of MFT, mft=6 count=1 br=-1: Input/output error Failed to open inode FILE_Bitmap: Input/output error Failed to sync device /dev/sdf1: Input/output error Failed to mount '/dev/sdf1': Input/output error NTFS is either inconsistent, or there is a hardware fault, or it's a SoftRAID/FakeRAID hardware. In the first case run chkdsk /f on Windows then reboot into Windows twice. The usage of the /f parameter is very important! If the device is a SoftRAID/FakeRAID then first activate it and mount a different device under the /dev/mapper/ directory, (e.g. /dev/mapper/nvidia_eahaabcc1). Please see the 'dmraid' documentation for more details.

Lazy excuses

On Vacation Posted from my Commodore 64

Quacks

QUACK QUACK While I was preparing to bring Duck Duck to y'all's attention (because it advertises itself as "The search engine that doesn't track you," I thought what the hell, let's see how good it is at searching.  In the eleven years or so that I've used Blogger, I've posted exactly 32,047 times on Curmudgeonly & Skeptical.    It would be fair to say that at least 20,000 of them used my on-again-off-again blog description "If you're trying to change minds and influence people it's probably not a good idea to say that virtually all elected Democrats are liars, but what the hell."  I coined it, and it's been accessed well over 6 million times. I posted the results in the scroll box below. The quack answer is that C&S received no credits.  Not one.  Not just from Duck Duck, but from no search engine.  Duck- Duck, and all but Google and Dogpile, did mention C&S posts I made during the few years I posted using my own Terpsboy.com server.  But, nothing from Google (which owns Blogger for chrissake!). In those 32,047 posts, it would be fair to say that, at a minimum, 32,047 pictures were published.  I'll posit that about 90% were original, or value added.  It has not been lost on me that, given the number of times I use Google image search a day, I've never seen any of my stuff.  I do run across some Terpsboy pictures, some even attributed; but no Bloggers.   I am not, by the way, making any claims to greatness, far from it.  I am suggesting that Google uses it's muscle discriminately.  One of the first things that happened after Google purchased Blogger was that C&S was shut down.  The excuse was I was accused of something or other.  I had been under attack from lefty blogs who made it a habit to accuse people they disagreed with of being liars, inciting to riot and too stupid to be allowed to use machinery.  It wasn't until Linda SoG made it something of a personal crusade that I was allowed back.  On the bright side, perhaps my guardian angel has engineered this "shield of anonymity" as a way to protect me from Obama hit men.  RELATED Exclusive: How Google’s Algorithm Rules the Web CRAP

Cataracts

“ Just had my left eye de-cateracked.  Piece of cake. In recovery.  PS - While the nurse was prepping me I said "This place reminds me of the Obama Administration." She just looked at me stony faced. "Yeah, every thing here is eye-eye-eye" Stony face. Whoops. Sent From ICU ”

Piece of Cake

“ Cataract Schmateract Didn't feel a thi  Excruciating pain because, in a G. Gordon Liddy  moment I faced my fear and refused all pain meds.  One nurse yelled, "This is the bravest patient we've ever had."  I wanted to do the cutting myself but the surgeon said it wasn't allowed by my insurance,  Pussies, Piece of cake. Now where's that bear I'm supposed to rape? ”

Creche Selfie

Oh Me Me Me

Toonist's lance a boil

Today's i i i TOONS

cuzzin ricky

Woe are me

Democrats Up in 2014 Vent Their Obamacare Anger in White House Meeting We Stand By It As a Theatrical Work “ Updated 3:50 p.m. | President Barack Obama heard an earful at the White House Wednesday from Senate Democrats running for re-election next year who are fuming about the Affordable Care Act’s rocky rollout. " Crisis of confidence” That’s the phrase Democratic Sen. Barbara A. Mikulski of Maryland used repeatedly Tuesday morning to .... " During a two-hour meeting that was not on the president’s public schedule, the president met with 15 Senate Democrats facing the voters next year, as well as Democratic Senatorial Campaign Committee Chairman Michael Bennet, D-Colo. Sen. Mark Begich of Alaska issued a release after the meeting torching the administration. “It is simply unacceptable for Alaskans to bear the brunt of the Administration’s mismanagement blah-blah-blah-me-me-meme ... Key words - " Senate Democrats running for re-election next year..." ”

Inside a Despotic Head

Oh My

On a mission

Oh My I'll be on a mission much of the day  yikes